My Bella Can Sing
by taylorcullenforever
Summary: Edward left Bella 50 yrs ago.When Edward finds her unexpectedly,she finds herself falling for 3 guys.When secrets come out & Edward's clear of wrong doing, Bella see that life's beautiful but complicated. And decides that sometime love is best left behind
1. Finding Out

This set 50 yrs. after the Cullens left. So please be nice.

Twilight Lover 4 Now has given me her old story! : If you don't believe me and think I took her story go check her out... on the last page of this story it says given to me! :

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters except Oliver

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Ch 1

(BPOV)

Hurry up Marie; the fans are waiting, screams, Tim my manager. With that I strutted all way the on stage wearing an outfit Alice would be proud of. Then I gave my fans what they wanted.

"What song do you guys want me to sing"

"Since You Been Gone" screamed my fans

Here's the thing  
We started out friends  
It was cool, but it was all pretend  
Yeah, yeah, since you been gone  
You dedicated, you took the time  
Wasn't long, til I called you mine  
Yeah, yeah, since you been gone  
And all you'd ever hear me say  
Is how I pictured me with you  
That's all you'd ever hear me say

But since you been gone  
I can breathe for the first time  
I'm so moving on, yeah yeah  
Thanks to you now I get what I want  
Since you been gone

How can I put it, you put me on  
I even fell for that stupid love song  
Yeah, yeah, since you been gone  
How come I'd never hear you say  
I just wanna be with you  
Guess you never felt that way

But since you been gone  
I can breathe for the first time  
I'm so moving on, yeah yeah  
Thanks to you now I get what I want  
Since you been gone

You had your chance, you blew it  
Out of sight, out of mind  
Shut your mouth, I just can't take it  
Again and again and again and again

Since you been gone (since you been gone)  
I can breathe for the first time  
I'm so moving on, yeah yeah  
Thanks to you (thanks to you)  
Now I get, I get what I want  
I can breathe for the first time  
I'm so moving on, yeah yeah  
Thanks to you (thanks to you)  
Now I get (I get)  
You should know, that I get  
I get what I want

Since you been gone  
Since you been gone  
Since you been gone

"Good night London"

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Meanwhile, in Albany

"OMG that's Bella" screamed Alice that everyone in the house heard.

"What is it Alice" Edward mumbled until he saw his Bella singing and her talking about my lullaby.

Everyone came downstairs shocked in awe, at what they saw on the TV. My Bella is a vampire.

Alice went into to vision mode trying to find where Bella was at and then it came to her Bella was writing and stopped and said bye-bye Alice. Alice was surprised mumbling "How did Bella know I was having a vision".

Edward "Did you find where she's at?" asked in a squeaky voice.

"No, but her next tour stop is..."

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Ok I got this story from Twilight Lover 4 Now. She is my BFF (really we go to the same schools) and she handed me her story. She is working on another one as we speak. So I will be taking hold of this story! :


	2. The Concert

Ch 2

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters Except Oliver

Thanks for reading.

-taylorcullenforever

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"Edward, the next stop will be in Sydney, Australia and I bought tickets except I can't get backstage passes" said Alice.

"So can we go now" screamed Edward and Emmett.

"Emmett when did you want to go see Bella" said Edward.

"Duh, poop for brains she is my baby sister" said Emmett.

"You two stop fighting and packs your bags" yelled Esme in a soft yet deadly tone.

"Yay, we are going to Australia '' squeaked Rose.

And with that the Cullens got their bags and rushed to the airport. Edward thought to himself "in a few hours I'll be with my Bella" then boarded the plane.

As the Cullens except for Carlisle got to Sydney they were in total awe in how it has changed. For a brief moment a freesica smell was in the air then it vanished. The Cullens ran all over the city searching for the smell again but didn't find it and ran back to their hotel.

But then Alice remembered "that's Bella's Concert is in a few hours" and with that grabbed Rose to go shopping. "You guys, Bella's concert is in a few hours start shopping "said Alice then they ran to the nearest store.

At the Sydney Opera House

Marie singing the ending to Before He Cheats at the sound check. Great, Marie now get into that dressing room till showtime.

-Cullens arrive at the concert and its begins-

"I'm going to sing HollaBack Girl''

Uh huh, this is my shit  
All the girls stomp your feet like this

A few times I've been around that track  
So it's not just gonna happen like that  
Because I ain't no hollaback girl  
I ain't no hollaback girl _x2_

Ooooh ooh, this my shit, this my shit _x4_

I heard that you were talking shit  
And you didn't think that I would hear it  
People hear you talking like that, getting everybody fired up  
So I'm ready to attack, gonna lead the pack  
Gonna get a touchdown, gonna take you out  
That's right, put your pom-poms downs, getting everybody fired up

A few times I've been around that track  
So it's not just gonna happen like that  
Because I ain't no hollaback girl  
I ain't no hollaback girl _x2_

Ooooh ooh, this my shit, this my shit _x4_

So that's right dude, meet me at the bleachers  
No principals, no student-teachers  
Both of us want to be the winner, but there can only be one  
So I'm gonna fight, gonna give it my all

Gonna make you fall, gonna sock it to you  
That's right I'm the last one standing, another one bites the dust

A few times I've been around that track  
So it's not just gonna happen like that  
Because I ain't no hollaback girl  
I ain't no hollaback girl _x2_

Ooooh ooh, this my shit, this my shit _x4_

Let me hear you say this shit is bananas  
B-A-N-A-N-A-S  
(This shit is bananas)  
(B-A-N-A-N-A-S)

Again  
This shit is bananas  
B-A-N-A-N-A-S  
(This shit is bananas)  
(B-A-N-A-N-A-S)

A few times I've been around that track  
So it's not just gonna happen like that  
Because I ain't no hollaback girl  
I ain't no hollaback girl _x2_

Ooooh ooh, this my shit, this my shit _x4_

I can't believe Alice is singing the words to this song thought Edward.

"Oh, no" thought Alice as she had a vision.

"Edward you might want to get out of here" said Alice.

"Why'' said Edward.

"Cause Bella just saw you and she is pissed" said Alice.

Right There I saw Edward, I love him but I hate him thought Bella.

"Time to cause a little hell" said Bella and then her eyes went flaming red and looked at Edward causing him to scream in pain.

"This is dedicated to Edward"said Bella in an angry voice.

Your love is like a tidal wave, spinning over my head  
Drownin me in your promises, better left unsaid  
You're the right kind of sinner, to release my inner fantasy  
The invincible winner, and you know that you were born to be  
You're a heartbreaker  
Dream maker, love taker  
Dont you mess around with me!  
Your' a heartbreaker  
Dream maker, love taker  
Don't you mess around- no no no!

Your love has set my soul on fire, burnin out of control  
You taught me the ways of desire, now its takin its toll  
You're the right kind of sinner, to release my inner fantasy  
The invincible winner, and you know that you were born to be

You're a heartbreaker  
Dream maker, love taker  
Don't you mess around with me!  
You're a heartbreaker  
Dream maker, love taker

Don't you mess around - no no no!

You're the right kind of sinner, to release my inner fantasy  
The invincible winner, and you know that you were born to be

You're a heartbreaker  
Dream maker, love taker  
Don't you mess around with me!  
You're a heartbreaker  
Dream maker, love taker  
Don't you mess around with me!

You're a heartbreaker  
Dream maker, love taker  
Don't you mess around with me!  
You're a heartbreaker  
Dream maker, love taker  
Heartbreaker!

''Good Night, Sydney" said Bella then she telephoned off the stage.

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Did You Like this chapter, if you did then review. Should Bella forgive Edward or find a new love.

P.S. Don't own SM's characters and the songs

:0)


	3. Edward? Oliver?

**Hi readers im back , but now im adding a twist in my bella can sing and stuff is gonna get spicy**

**a.k.a she teleported to her house**

Disclaimer: I dont own anyone except Oliver

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"Bella welcome back."Oliver said squeezing her as she made her first step into her house. (Oliver is a vampire too)

"Thanks Oliver," said Bella.

"How was the tour?" asked Oliver.

"I saw the Cullens there, then everything else was good." mumbled Bella.

"What!"screamed Oliver almost breaking the table.

"Its fine they don't know where I'm at right now which is good.'' said Bella trying to calm down Oliver in the process.

"Are you sure Bella?"said Oliver in a stern yet loving voice.

" I think,'' whispered Bella. "Oliver what did you do while I was gone?" says Bella.

" Just hangin with my family in Volterra." said Oliver.( duh the Volturi)

Doorbell rings

"I'll get it," says Oliver.

"OK," says Bella skipping around the house.

"Big Brother is that you?" says Edward. Bella gets to the door and freezes in place when she sees Edward.

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ok, should Bella go with Oliver or Edward?? Which too choose??


	4. I love him but Hate him

Ok, I dont own anyone except Oliver.

This is MY new chapter... if you like it Review and tell me what you think.

Thanks Twilight Lover 4 Now for the story! :

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I was still frozen when Edward walked into my house. Oliver was at my side, he was obviously in shock too.

"Edward?" Oliver said, his voice shaky. They were brothers? What? What was going on? Was there something I didn't know?

"Uh, what the hell is going on?" I said, my voice leaking acid. Edward looked at me, his eyes growing liquid gold. If I had a heart it would have been beating like a hummingbird. I was in love with him but at the same I hated him so much. He left me and now he is here. I was about to freak out.

"Uh, Bella. Honey why don't we all sit down and I can explain." I looked over at Oliver. His face now had no expression.

"Fine, but you have a LOT to explain. I want to know everything. No bullshit." I said, walking over to the couch, sitting down, and clasping my hands together. This was not good. Edward sat over on the other couch and Oliver sat down next to Edward. I looked back and forth between them and noticed they look somewhat alike. How I had not noticed this, I didn't know.

"Bella, baby. Edward and I are brothers," Oliver said, looking at me. Waiting for me to say something. I looked down at my head, rapidly shaking my head to get out of this bad dream. Gawd, Edward left me and now i'm dating his _brother_! This was so very messed up.

"Ok, keep going." I said, my voice only a whisper. There was no way this was true. It couldn't be.

"Like you know, our parents were killed by the spanish influenza. But did Edward ever tell you he had a older brother?"

"No, he never told me that." And he hadn't. I couldn't believe he hadn't told me he had a older brother.

"I'm the older brother. Oliver Mason." Oliver said, still looking for my reaction. I kept my head down.

"Oh my gosh," was all I could say.

"I know. I know." Oliver said.

"Uh, Bella? Can I talk to alone for a second?" I then heard Edward say. My head snapped up, I glared at him. But then my face softened. I would only let him talk to me this once.

"Fine. But only once." I said, getting up and going into the other room. Edward at my heels. As I turned around, his lips met mine. The feeling of his lips against mine so familiar. His hand tangled into my hair, pulling me closer to him. Right now, I did not hate him. I loved him. His tongue gained entrance to my mouth, out tongues dancing together. I couldn't help but kiss back. Even thought it was wrong, all I wanted to do was kiss him. He deepened the kiss and I found myself drowning in him. I wanted him. I wanted him so bad. He pushed me against the wall, his hands touching all over me. Then I thought about Oliver. Oliver was Edward's brother and I was dating him. I was dating him and yet here I was making- out with Edward. I pulled back then and looked at Edward. I had to choose. Oliver or Edward.

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Ok, so this is my new chapter for this story. Now, things are going to get a little hecktic and crazy. I just got this story from my Bff Twilight Lover 4 Now and i'm now making the plot. If you like this chapter Review and tell me. :


	5. I'm Not Worth Anything

I don't own any characters except for Oliver

Hope you like this chapter, its a cliffy.

-taylorcullenforever (**Has some language CAUTION)**

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I wanted to kiss him again. I wanted to kiss him for forever. Oh, god. Look at me! I want to kiss Edward and I'm with Oliver. Then Oliver came in.

"What the hell?!" He yelled. He ran over to us, punching Edward in the face.

"She is MINE!" He yelled, Edward and him on the floor, punching the shit out of each other. I was in shock. How could I want to kiss him so after everything he had done to me, plus the fact that I was dating his brother Oliver. I was horrible. I was horrible, I was. They were still punching, when I finally snapped out of my thoughts.

"Stop it NOW!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. They both stopped, looking at me. "Stop and hold on for a second. Jeez. Get off each other, now!" I said. They both stood up, glaring daggers at each other.

"Bella, I love you. I have always loved you. Every second I was gone from you. I wanted the best for you, that is why I left. Please, I want you. I need you. I love you. Marry me." Edward said, pulling out a gorgeous diamond ring. I gasped. He loved me? He wanted me? He wanted to marry me? Oliver was now seriously pissed. I looked at Edward, and he got on one knee.

"Isabella Marie Swan, marry me. Be my wife. For all eternity." He said, holding the ring out to me. I looked at it, and ran my fingers across it. Edward was finally here and had just proposed to me. I had always wanted him, I could no longer fake it. I had always wanted him, I always will. But was I willing to be so willing at let him right back into my life. There was also the matter of Oliver. I loved Oliver. I was dating Oliver. I couldn't say yes to Edward, at least not yet. I was unsure.

"I'm sorry, Edward. I can't say yes. I need to think about it." I said. But I had other things to say too. It was time for me to tell him everything I had always wanted to tell him since he left. "How could you leave me! HUH!? How could you! I loved you so fucking much, and you left me! You left me! Do you know how badly you hurt me! Do you?! I felt numb, sad, heartbroken, and pain for 40 years! 40 fucking years! You messed me up, I couldn't even get up in the morning let alone do anything else. I wanted to just lay in bed all day and think of you. I wanted you. I looked at the pictures we took over and over. You hurt me so badly," I was starting to cry. Wait I was crying? I had only cried two times after being changed. But I was crying. "Then Oliver came and helped me. He fixed me, he put me back together. You can't just except me to get right back together with you. I'm sorry." I said, venom running down my face.

"This is bullshit. Bella, just go with him. You're not even worth all this crap for. You're not worth it!" Oliver said, looking at me. I stopped crying, then started crying even harder.

"I'm not worth it?" I asked, my voice shaky.

"No you're not." I was crying even harder.

"No, i'm not. I will never be worth keeping. Worth fighting for. I'm worthless. I always knew it. I always knew it. I'm nothing." I said, running out of the house and onto my motor cycle. I sped toward the highway. I was going back to Forks.

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Sorry this chapter was so short. I'm trying to work with the story and figure out exactly what is going to happen. This chapter is pretty sad and mean. Oliver is not a bad guy. You'll find that out in the next chapter. Don't hate Oliver, he really is a good sweet guy. Hope you like the chapter. Review!! :

-taylorcullenforever


	6. Why?

Ok, here is another chapter. Thank you to all of the people who reviewed! I'm glad you like the story! Hopefully you like the chapter... there are going to be some shocking things you are going to find out, so i'm going to let you read the story now!

Thanks for reading

Disclaimer: I dont own anyone but Oliver

-taylorcullenforever

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I heard footsteps, then the door opened. I tried my best to smile.

"Bella?" he said. I smiled the best I could. I walked forward, grabbing onto him and squeezing him. I started crying all over again, the venom streaking my already wet cheeks.

"Hi, Charlie." I said into his chest. He could see the state I was in and rubbed soothing circles on my back, squeezing me too. This was probably the first time Charlie had ever really hugged me. It felt nice, comforting and familiar. I started crying even more.

"Honey, why don't you come in out of the cold and sit down." Charlie said.

"Ok," He walked with me over to the couch, sitting me down. I cradled my head in my hands as the sobs shook through my torso. Charlie immediately sat next to me, moving my body so that I was hugging and leaning on his chest again. I soaked his T-shirt as we sat there in silence. I finally was able to get my sobs under control but the venom was still flowing endlessly down my face. My eyes were burning and drooping to no end. I sniffled, pulling back a little from Charlie. I wiped my red, sore face on the back on my hand.

"Are you ok?" Charlie asked, his voice tender and soft. I sniffled again and nodded my head.

"Yes," I said, my voice hoarse and rough. I cleared my throat.

"Do you mind telling me what happened?" Charlie asked. I leaned into the couch, letting out a big breath and closing my very sore eyes. Though the burning in my eyes didn't stop, I felt somewhat better closing them.

"No, as long as you're willing to listen to all of it. It's a long story." I said. He took my hand.

"Sure, sweetie. Just tell me. I'll be here as long as you're talking." So I told him, I told him everything. Charlie knew I was a vampire. He had found out, when he had coming searching for me after I had turned. He had heard of the legends of the Quileutes and had believed them, to my surprise, and he figured out that I was one. He was so furious when he had found out but had calmed down over the years. He had turned into one too. He was attacked when someone came looking for me. So here we were the same ages as we were 50 years ago. He nodded and followed along with everything I said. When I got finished he nodded and shook his head.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. You are worth keeping. I know you are. You just haven't found the right person yet. " He said, reassuringly. I started crying again.

"I'll never find my someone, Dad." I said, crying on his shirt again.

"Yes, you will. You just have to be patient and wait for that someone to come along. You have all eternity anyway, right?" He teased me. I giggled.

"Yep, all eternity." I said. Then the door bell went off. I groaned, couldn't anyone just leave me and Charlie alone in our time of bonding? Gosh.

"I'll get it, honey. Just stay here." Charlie said getting up, placing me on the couch, and walking off toward the door. I laid my body on the couch, feeling the rough fabric brushing against my arms and face. I sighed, closing my eyes and thinking of Edward.

"Uh, she is in here. Are you sure she will see you?" I heard Charlie ask, but I paid no attention, I was sure it was just someone that was a fan. No one special. I heard footsteps and I pressed myself father int o the couch as if to blend in with it. I mentally laughed at that fact. Then I felt cold arms around me. Charlie. I kept my eyes closed as I was lifted and place upon someone. I was sure it was Charlie. I opened my eyes, to find someone I was so not expecting. I jumped up out of his arms. My expression appalled. How dare he tell me what he had and then hold me in his arms as if nothing had happened. How dare he! I was no pissed to the point of not calming return.

"Oliver! What the hell are you doing here!" I screamed at him, losing me cool. He looked at me, nothing but innocence on his face. Then I slapped him. How could he have told me I was nothing and not worth anything, then come and hold me in his arms. I knew that my slap had not hurt him or caused him pain but his face was flooded with betrayal and pain. I was so wanting the slap him again. Just the feel of his face sweeping against my palm felt amazing.

"I came here for you. I love you." he said, still the painful look on his face. I slap him again, this time at vampire strength. He went flying back from the couch, landing on the floor. He was on his back, lying there as if he were helpless. I walked over to him, putting him between my legs. I looked straight at him.

"How dare you! How dare you! You tell me I'm not worth fighting for and then you come here and tell me you love me! What the hell!" I screamed at him. He looked frightened of me and I was glad he seemed that way. I was tired of being treated like shit and being left. I was done dealing with it. I was finally standing my ground and saying what I needed to say.

"Please, Bella. Let me explain. I only said that so that maybe Edward would see that he was hurting you again and leave you be. So we--" I cut him off with another blow to the face. Sending him flying across the floor.

"Liar!" I screamed. Then someone walked in.

"Bella? What is going on?" A familiar voice called. I shouldn't have know who the voice belonged to so easily but I did. I turned around and found him looking at me with a confused expression on his face. Why couldn't I ever get a break??

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Ok, thanks for reading. I hoped you liked this chapter. So Charlie is a vampire, yes! I know, wow! But i'm guessing you know who the mystery guy is! lol REVIEW and tell me what you think.

Luv you guys

-taylorcullenforever


	7. You Slept With Her? Why!

Ok, here is another chapter. Hope you guys like it. Now, remember Bella is not barely like the Bella we all know and love. So she is going to be very OOC. But here is one hell of a twist that probably none of you were expecting.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters! -starts crying-

Thanks for reading!

-taylorcullenforever

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I stood where I was and closed my eyes. I really didn't think I was going to stay under control with Oliver and Edward here. I couldn't believe Edward had come back to me also. Or was he even here for _me_? I didn't know and somewhat didn't care. I took a deep breath and turned to face him.

"What the hell do _you want_ now? Huh?" I growled to Edward, he was looking back and forth between Oliver and I. I saw in the corner of my eye that Charlie was backing off to the other side of the room. Probably knowing that I was seriously already pissed and that a fight was sooner or later going to break out. Edward finally looked me. His eyes looking at me longingly. It made me sick. He took one step toward me and I immediately growled.

"Don't you step toward me!" I growled at him. He took the one step back.

"Bella, calm down. Calm down." Edward said to me, a smile playing on his lips. He held out a hand toward me.

"I will not fucking calm down! How can I calm down when 'Mr. I love you, yet you're not good enough' over here is just asking for a freakin beating. And you 'Mr. Oh I left your sorry ass because you were not good enough but hey! Now I'm back let's totally get back together' is just bothering the shit out of me! Huh? Can you please answer me? Can you?" I yelled at Edward. I was kind of scaring myself. Edward took a few steps back, a scared expression coming to rest on his face.

"I don't know. Bella, please. Let's just sit down and talk everything out. Tell each other what one another was thinking and why they did this and that. Please, let's just talk everything out!" Edward said, his voice calm but still a little shaky. I took in a few deep breaths, thinking the gesture through. Should I let them talk about everything that has happened? Should I? I wanted to but then they both left me. Why should I let them talk to me after that. Well Oliver, hadn't really left me, but had done me really bad damage from the words he had said to me. I cringed, my chest filling with pain.

"No! Why should I let you _talk_ to me about anything. When you left me, crushing me and making me want to _die_! And Oliver saying I wasn't worth it after I told him over and over I wasn't and him saying I was. Why should I let you guys talk to me, when all you assholes have done is kill me?" I said to him, trying not to growl or yell. Sadness filled his eyes. My voice got stuck in my throat.

"I'm so sorry. I am." Edward whispered. But I heard him. I felt guilty then for not letting him talk to me. I then felt my head smash into the ground. After a second I looked up to find Oliver holding me down. I squirmed and kicked, using my vampire power. But he was a little more stronger than I was. I growled and stopped squirming. I put my head down on the ground, looking up at the ceiling.

"You are going to talk to us about everything." Oliver said. Looking at me.

"Whatever, 'Mr. I love you, yet you're not good enough'" I said.

"Bella, stop that. If you would let me explain you would not be calling me that." Oliver said, grimacing when I said that to him. I smirked at this.

"Mmmkka, 'Mr. I love you, yet you're not good enough'" I said, watching him grimace again.

"We are going to talk to you one at a time. Just calm down and let us explain everything. Though you will probably come back to me after all the talking."

"Whatever Oliver. She is going to be coming back to me. She loves me more than you. I know that. I know it!" Edward growled at Oliver. Now, Oliver was pissed. He got off me and ran over to Edward. Getting in his face.

"Whatever you prude son of a bitch! She will be coming back to me. At least I never left her. At least I comforted her and helped her with the pain. Were you here, when she was depressed and in so much pain that she was starting to go crazy? No, you weren't! You were out with Tanya!" Oliver yelled right in Edward's face. I slowly got up, getting my eyes on Oliver and Edward. I felt nothing but pain when Oliver said the last sentence to Edward. Venom was flooding my vision and flowing down my face harder than they ever had. He had been . . . with . . . _Tanya_? The pain coursed through my veins and body.

"Ahh!" I screamed at my chest throbbed. I fell down, my head hitting the floor and my arms tearing at my chest. The pain was unbearable. This was just a little worse than the pain I had felt when Edward had left and all the months of trying to get over the fact that he . . . was . . . _gone_. I heard Charlie, Oliver, and Edward run over to me.

"Bella, are you okay?" I heard Charlie's fatherly voice ask me. The pain was making me lose consciousness. I fell on my back, my head spinning. I saw Edward kneel down beside me, placing one hand on the side of my face. He bent down and kissed my very gently. One his lips met mine, they molded with his. The electric current sparking. Then the pain was gone. There was no pain in this, only love. Love. Then I heard it.

"Eddie? What the hell?" I heard an angelic voice call from the front door. I heard Charlie gasp. I reluctantly parted my lips from Edward's, looking over toward the voice. It was _her_!

"Gasp!" Was all that came out of my mouth. There she was perfect and gorgeous. Her strawberry blonde hair resting around her face perfectly. She looked like a goddess. Tanya.

"Bella? Edward? Edward we just made love and here you are kissing that ugly bitch!" She screamed at us. They had just . . . _made_ . . . _love_? They had just _screwed_ each other! Edward had just . . . oh _hell no_! I kicked Edward off me, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. The pain was instantly returning but the burning to kill Tanya was making the pain seem like nothing. I quickly got up, running vampire speed over to Tanya. I slapped her across the face. She tried to cover her face, so I hit half her face and half her hand.

"What the hell! Oh NO! My nail! You totally broke two of my beautiful nails!" She said, examining her broken and chipped nails. I could not believe this fucking Barbie was worried about her nails when I was about to rip her to shreds and _burn_ her!

"OMG! Did ms. Barbie break one of her precious nails! Oh gosh!" I mimicked placing a hand over my mouth, showing my terror. She growled and came toward me. I dodged her, making her fall face forward onto the floor.

"OMG! Did you hurt your ugly fake nose?" I asked. Totally mocking one of her 'omg' moves. She growled and ran toward me again. This time I moved myself, so that when she passed I grabbed her arm. Turning it 360 degrees and ripping it off. She turned back toward me, a shocked expression on her face, looking down at her arm laying in my hands. I laughed at this. I threw the arm behind me and ran toward her. I ripped the other one off, also, throwing it behind me. She was now getting scared of me. I could tell I had a lethal and deadly expression on my face, making her back away from me. I couldn't believe Edward had not stepped in and stopped me yet.

"Eddie! Eddiepuss! **(A/N I totally got this off the YouTube video James Truth by Smokeyfizz. Go check it out) **Help me!" Tanya shouted toward him, and he stepped forward a little. I turned me head toward him, unraveling the look on my face on him. He backed off his eyes growing wider and wider. I then took off Tanya's perfect, marble, left leg. She screamed. I then wondered how I had become this horrible person. Hurting someone because my ex-fiancée has left me for her. That did not really give me permission to lose it like this. But I had snapped. Oliver, Edward, and now Tanya had made me snap. I was about to rip off her other leg, when I saw the horrified look on her face. I then stepped back.

"Tanya, how long have you and Eddiepuss been screwing each other?" I asked her and she flinched back from me.

"About 3 months before he left you to now. So about 50 years and something months." She said, her voice unbelievably shaky.

"Wow, and I didn't even know. I didn't even know." I said more to myself then Tanya. I looked her straight in the eye.

"I'm sorry for doing . . . er . . . this to you. I just _snapped_. You know?" I asked her. She nodded.

"Yea, I know exactly how you are feeling. It's . . . uh . . . ok? I would have freaked just like you."

"Yea . . . I guess." I was becoming a _monster_. I really was. I was a _monster_.

"Uh, Bella? It's my turn to apologize." Tanya said. I looked up at her shocked. Apologize for what? Sleeping with Edward? For being the reason that I've been going crazy?

"For what?" I asked. She looked down.

"I should have told you. I would have been just as hurt as you were if my fiancée had done this to me. I'm sorry."

"Ahahaha!" I laughed, not being able to hold it in.

"That's . . . uh . . . funny?" She asked me, still flinching back from me.

"I never thought I would ever here you say sorry! Wow, I should have got that on tape!" I joked, she laughed along at that.

"Wow, this is awkward!" I said. Tanya nodded.

"Yea, but you might want to leave. You will soon think about all of this again and be filled with the wanting to kill me again. Trust me."

"Ok."

"Bella." Oliver and Edward said. I growled at this. I was still fucking pissed at them and they were not at all off the hook with me.

"What?"

"Can I talk to you sometime about everything, please?" I heard Oliver ask. I turned toward him a smile on my lips. I was not going to be a monster to him. He had not left me or slept with another women. I was going to let him explain.

"Yea, Olly. You can talk to me. But first I have to see someone. Mmmkka?" I said to him. He smiled back at me.

"Ok, Bella."

"As for you Edward. I don't even want to look at you. But I want to talk about everything too. _Everything_. I'll call you guys sometime. But I have to go see someone."

"Bella," Edward said, reaching for me. I moved back even farther from him.

"Don't come any closer to me." I totally had forgotten that Charlie was there. I turned to him.

"Dad, I'm going to go see a dear friend. That might be able to help me right now. I will call you tomorrow. And let you know that I'm fine."

"Ok, honey. Be safe." He said and I froze. The memory of the note Edward had left me playing in my head.

"Yea, _be safe_." I ran out of the house, running toward the one place that would be any help to me now. The one place that the one person I needed was. I needed _him_. He was the only one who could help me. I needed . . . Alex.

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Ok, right now you are probably going WOW! That was diffrent! Yes, it was. I twisted the story up pretty good. Now, you are probably asking 'why is Bella so forgiving to Tanya'. Well to start, she totally just ripped her arms and a leg off. Plus, she doesnt want to be a monster. So yea. Review and tell me what you think.

And for those of you wondering. I am going to start writing the next chapter for He Left, I'm Pregnant.

REVIEW and thanks so much for reading!

-taylorcullenforever


	8. If Only

Ok, here is my next chapter.

Thank you so much for Reviewing!

Disclaimer: I don't own any character except for Alex and Oliver.

Thanks for reading,

-taylorcullenforever

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Alex, that was who I needed to see. I had met Alex, while touring through Italy. When I had seen his gold eyes, I knew exactly what he was. When he saw me, he knew what I was too. We had gotten along really well and had become very close while I had spent some time in Italy. Like the Cullens, he only drank animal blood. But when I had to leave Italy, I cried for days knowing I was leaving Alex behind. But for some reason, on the day I was leaving for America, I felt as if we would be together again soon. So I tried to be strong and left Alex waving me off. I could still see him standing there, shirttails flapping, arms spread up in the air, as if waving me off on a grand trip while he stayed behind. The imaged stayed stuck behind my eye lids. The image making me cry. Before I knew it, I had closed my eyes, feeling a drop of venom slowly slide down my cheek. Leaving a trail of salt water behind. I sniffled trying to suck it up. But my tears failed me, as one by one, they slide slowly down my cheeks. Then I opened my eyes to find myself sitting on a plane. I faintly remember getting the ticket and boarding but the image was still all I could see, it had taken all my focus away. I had a window seat, the lights of the airport lighting up the dark night sky. I let myself fall away, the image taking my focus, letting me slowly fall away. The pilot's voice brought me back into reality, telling everyone we were about to lift off and to put on our seat belts. I buckled up and turned to the other seat next to me. It was empty. I was relieved that no one was going to be sitting beside me, that I could loose myself in my thoughts without having to worry about the person beside me. I found myself going into a slumber a few minutes later, only remembering calling out Alex's name.

-A Few Hours Later-

I jumped in my seat as someone passed by, their bag thumping against the seat next to me. I groggily rubbed my eyes with the back of hand, stretching out. I stiffly got up and started walking off the plane behind a line of other people. I got off the plane and went out into the parking lot. Alice would be proud of me for what I was about to do. I quickly stole a Porshe 911 Turbo, speeding out of the parking lot and heading toward Volterra. Alex would be wondering somewhere in Volterra, close to the Volturi. He was close to them and never strayed to far from them. As I drove I could feel all the fury and madness fading from me, as if it was draining. I then felt all the sadness and pressure that I should have felt when I fould out about Tanya and Edward. I starting bawling not being able to help myself, but as time passed and I got closer and closer the Volterra, I seemed to dry up. Having no more tears to cry. I sat in the car, hands on the steering wheel, eyes on the road, dry sobbing. It seemed like everything in my life was falling apart all over again, just as I had re-built it. Just as I was about to stop and pull over I saw Volterra and pushed on the gas even harder. Going over 150. In no time I was in Volterra, I pulled over and jumped out of my car. I had no clue where he would be so I would have to walk around and hope to run into him. As I walked I looked at everyone's face, they all looked human. Blood pulsing under their skin, seeing all these humans reminded me that I was not human. I was still looking at many faces as I wondered closer and closer to the Palazzo dei Priori (the clock tower). As I searched among more faces a robe caught my eye. I turned toward the person, running over to the person. I could see a familiar skater shoe, like the pair I had bought Alex, out from under the robe. I smiled and ran closer to Alex. When I was behind him I stopped.

"Alex?" I called, my voice soft and sweet. I could see Alex stiffen. After about 3 seconds he turned around with a huge, goofy grin on his mouth.

"My Bella!" He ran toward me, closing the last few feet between us. I hugged him, my arms and hands clasping onto him, trying to hold him there as if he might leave me. After several minutes we let go and looked at each other.

"What are you doing here?" He asked me, looking down at my hands. "Where are your bags?"

"Well . . . I was kind of in a rush to get here. I was . . . some stuff happened and I just . . . urg." I said, fumbling for the right words to say to him. I looked down at my shoes. I looked up after a few seconds and saw that face, the one that told me he knew something was going on and was going to make me tell him. He pulled me into him, burying my face in his shoulder blade. I could feel his lips at my ear, his breath making me shiver.

"What happened? It's like you're falling apart. You're eyes look lifeless." Alex said, rubbing circles on my back. It seemed like all I did was run away and count on other people to listen to my problems and let me cry on their shoulder. It was wrong of me to come and see Alex just because I wanted him to fix my problems, make everything go away. I was crying.

"I'm . . . horrible . . . person . . . I came . . . here . . . to put all my problems on you. Because I couldn't face them myself!" I said, ruining his shirt with my venom.

"Nah, Bella. You're not a horrible person, coming to me. I'm always there for you. Come on." Alex said, picking me up in his arms. In a few seconds I felt myself being laid on something soft and warm. It was his bed. We were somewhere but at the moment I didn't care where. He laid down next to me, pulling me into him.

"Now tell me everything that happened. Something must of happened. Edward?" Alex asked, and I told him. I told him everything. And when I was done I felt so much lighter. Alex's faced was filled with shock.

"I can't believe Edward cheated on you with that Tanya bitch!" Alex said, shaking his head as if the meer thought of it made him sick.

"I can. She's perfect and blonde." I said, smashing my face farther into a pillow. But Alex lifted my head.

"You're perfect, you just don't see yourself as perfect. You only see yourself the way you think you see yourself. You see yourself as a flawed girl." He said to me. I shook my head. But was too tired to disagree. Crying had drained me and my lids were dropping heavily. Alex layed beside me, brushing my hair out of my face. But I was already asleep.

Alex POV

She was so beautiful sleeping. How could Edward have done something like that to her? Edward was simply killing Bella. But killing her so very slowly. She only thought of herself as flawed. But she was perfect. But because of Edward she only thought of herself as ugly and not worth keeping. I caressed my finger tips gently across her timple down to her chin.

"If only you knew how I felt. If only you could see how much I love you. If only you could see that I would love you, marry you, never hurt you, and never leave you. That I could give you everything and give you all the love you deserve. If only you would see. I love you, my sweet sweet Bella. If only" I whispered in her ear, but knew she could not hear me. I laid down right next to her, closing my eyes. The only thing on my mind was her.

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What do you think? Sorry if it was a little short, my eyes are dropping and i'm so very tired. Now if anyone is going to ask i want to explain beforehand...

Why does 3 guys love bella at the same time? Well i had all 3 of them in love wiht her for one purpose. . . . to make the story totally twisty! I mean wouldnt you be under a shit load of pressure if three guys were all in love with you and you totally had to pick! YEA! anyways, please review! PRETTY PLEASE WIT A CHERRY ON TOP!

-taylorcullenforever


	9. Please Come Back With Me?

**Okay, here is another chapter. I hope you like it! **

**Disclaimer: I dont own any characters except Oliver and Alex**

**Thanks so much for reading!**

**-taylorcullenforever**

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Alex POV

I was still laying beside Bella, her breathing slow and even telling me she was still asleep. But she was starting to stir, rolling over and over. As if trying to escape something . . . maybe a nightmare. I wouldn't be surprised if she was having one, especially after everything she had been through the past few days. I gently touched her face and she blushed. I quietly chuckled. In the back of my mind, I was constantly wondering if she was going to be staying or leaving. I wanted her to stay and if she was going to leave today I was going with her. Oliver and Edward were bound to come to Bella if she returns, apparently wanting to talk to her about everything and tell their sides of the story. I seriously think that Oliver and Edward just need to disppear from her life, she would be so much happier that way, or at least I think so. Really I just couldn't believe Oliver and Edward had done all that to her.

"Alex?" Bella said so softly. She finally stopped stiring and ended up facing me. Her eyes half-way open. I touched her face, my fingers lingering and ending up at her lucious lips. Her lips parted and I could feel the coolness of her breathe on my fingers.

"I'm here, Bella." I said, leaning down so I was face to face with her. She blinked a couple of time and her eyes slowly opened fully. She looked at me for a second and gave me a honest-to-god smile. The smile lighting up her face and eyes. She captivated me, everything about her did. We stared at each other for several long minutes before she said something. She took my hand and looked me straight in the eye, as if getting ready to ask me a hard question.

"Alex?" She said, looking down at my hand in hers. I kept my gaze on her face.

"Yes, Bella?" I said and she finally looked back at me. I could feel her fingers shaking a little. "What is it?"

"I . . . was . . . wondering. If you would come . . ." Bella stopped and took in a deep breath.

"Go on," I prompted, wanting to see know what the question was. Whatever it was I was going to say yes. No matter.

"I was wondering if you would come back to Forks with me. Just for a little bit. I don't think I can go back by myself. I might . . ." She said, struggling.

"Yes." She looked shocked for a second, then her expression turned grateful. She looked like she was starting to get tears in her eyes, well, venom to be exact.

"Really? You'll come with me?" She asked, astonishment in her voice. But at the same time I could hear a smile in her voice.

"Yes, I will go back with you and stay as long as you want me to." She smiled and slowly wrapped her arms around my torso. She squeezed me, I could tell she was longing just to hold onto something and hope it didnt leave her too. I knew her that well. I squeezed her back and we layed there on my bed, totally content in each other's arms.

Bella POV

Edward was kissing Tanya. His mouth moving urgently with her, as if he couldnt seem to get enough of her. But that wasnt everything that was happening. Slowly, pieces by piece their clothing was coming off them as they kissed deeper and deeper. I twisted and turned but I couldn't seemed to get out of seeing them right in front of me. The next thing I knew, Edward was taking off her underwear and stripping off his boxers. Edward moving them against the wall, finally entering her in intimacy. I cringed at the sight, hoping and praying it was not real. That is was just my imagination going wild. They thrusted and thrusted, their moans filling my mind. I felt pain bubbling in my chest, heart-break. But the sight continued as they kept on making-love. I felt something touch my face, gently and I blushed. The feeling pulling me out of the scene. I opened my eyes half-way to find myself in the same room I was last night with Alex. Meaning the whole intimacy scene between Edward and Tanya had been a dream, but a so real and vivid one.

"Alex?" I said out loud, hoping he was still here with me. I stopped turning and ended up facing him. But my eyes were still half-way closed. His fingers traced along my face, slowly ending up on my lips. The feeling stirring up butterflies in my stomach. I parted my lips, breath escaping and caressing his fingers.

"I'm here, Bella." He said. He leaned down so that we were face to face. My eyes were still heavy from yesterdays crying attack. But I blinked a few times, trying to make they feel less heavy and more awake. I was finally able to open them after a few blinks. I looked at Alex and gave him a smile. I was planning on leaving tomorrow, but I wanted Alex to come back with me. I didn't think I could take going back to Forks by myself, with Edward and Oliver there still, apparently, wanting to talk to me about everything. Really, I dont think my nerves or heart could take it. I was falling apart, I could slowly feel myself fading. And having to go back to Edward and Oliver so soon would only do me more damage. But the fact of the matter was, would Alex come to Forks with me. If he said no, I didn't know what I was going to do. I had no clothes or any showering things so I would have to go back, by myself. I finally took his hand and put it in mind, looking him straight in the eye. He studied my face, trying to figure out what I was doing.

"Alex?" I said, but stopped, looking down at his hand in mine. But I could feel his gaze intent on my face.

"Yes, Bella?" He asked, and I finally looked back up at him. I noticed my hands were shaking but I hoped he didnt notice. But knowing Alex, i'm sure he noticed. "What is it?" So I decided to go ahead and get the stupid question over with. But that was easier said than done.

"I . . . was . . . wondering. If you would come . . ." I stopped, taking a deep breath. Trying to get the rest out.

"Go on," he said, trying to get me to say whatever it was I was trying to say.

"I was wondering if you would come back to Forks with me. Just for a little bit. I don't think I can go back by myself. I might . . ." I stopped not wanting to tell him I would crumble into pieces, fall apart. But he answered my question before I could answer and his answer shocked me.

"Yes." I looked at him, completely shocked. I could feel the shocked expression covering my face. But that soon fell away. I started getting teary eyed.

"Really? You'll come with me?" I asked, I was so happy he was actually going to come with me. I somewhat couldnt believe it, but then again I could believe this coming from Alex.

"Yes, I will go back with you and stay as long as you want me to." I smiled really big and slowly, letting him know what I was doing, wrapped my arms around his torso. I squeezed him, trying to hold him to me. It felt nice to be able to hold onto one thing and have it not leave your or run away from you. Just stay with you, just stay. He squeezed me and we just layed on the bed. Maybe Alex was the answer to all my problems. I knew Alex would never do anything like Edward and Oliver had done to me. That wasnt even in his nature. But maybe, being with Alex would be the answer to all my dreams. But as we layed here, content in each other's arms, I was finally starting to believe maybe being with Alex was everything I have ever wanted.

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**Okay, it took me kind of a long time to update this chapter. **

**Because 1) i was finally finishing up my other story He Left, I'm Pregnant. Finally putting up the last chapter. Yay! **

**2) i was trying to figure out a way to have Alex and Bella stay together but have Bella go back to Forks. Which i finally found a way out. : which was good.**

**and 3) i have been extremly busy. **

**But thanks to everyone who has reviewed and read this story! **

**Please review and tell me what you think about this chapter. Pretty please.**

**So go ahead and click on the little review button... you know you want to. **

**haha... love you guys!**

**-taylorcullenforever**


	10. Invite The Pain Or Escape The Pain?

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Okay, here is another update! I thought this chapter throught and you might be surprised (or not) about what happens!

Hope you like the chapter

Thanks for reading

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters except Alex and Oliver

-taylorcullenforever

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B POV

I was lost in thought when Alex touched my shoulder. I snapped out of my thoughts and looked up at him. He was standing up and smiling at me.

"It's time to board the plane, Bella. Are you ready?" He asked me and I took a second to think that through. Was I really ready to go back to Forks and face everyone. Edward? Oliver? Plus, my tour manager was meeting with me in five days to talk about if I wanted to keep touring or take a break and work on more songs. Could I really deal with all of that? And face Tanya? Tanya! Mentally I shock my head.

"Yes," I said to Alex, standing up. Alex grabbed my hand. There was no question to if I was ready…. I had to be ready. I would end up facing them sometime soon, anyway. And why not invite the pain while its sharp and breath taking.

"Come on," We boarded the plane, passing people left and right. As we sat down, there was a couple in front of us. I quickly took the window seat, trying not to hear their 'I love yous' and trying not to see them kiss at the same time. I flung myself into my seat, looking out the window. Alex took notice.

"What's wrong, Bella?" He asked. I snapped my head over to look at him, trying not to see the couple. I pointed the couple in front of me, never looking away from him. He took one look and realized.

"Oh, sorry." He said, taking my hand again. I looked down at our intertwined hands.

"Yea, me too. But I have you. You make everything better." And he really did. I felt whole and safe with Alex. Which, really to be honest, I never felt with Oliver. The pilot came onto the speaker, telling everyone to buckle up and that we were about to take off. Alex and I buckled up. Alex got out a couple of magazines he had brought with him and I took out my ipod. I picked a song and let myself rest. Soon, enough we were in the air, on our way to Forks. Oliver and I had been living in Seattle, but I was planning on getting a house and settling down in Forks. Close to Charlie. I was also wondering where Edward, Oliver, and Tanya had gone. If they were in Forks, or gone? I was so lost in my thoughts, that before I knew it we were in Seattle. The seat belt sign went off and everyone started to get off the plane. I went into step behind Alex.

Finally we were off the plane and walking into the airport. Alex retrieved his bags, meeting me by the women's rest room. As, we walked outside I forgot I had ran here, not bothering to use a car.

"Do you just want to run to Forks?" I asked Alex.

"I'm guessing you didn't bother using a car." I shook my head. But out of the corner of my eye I could see something flying at my head. As I looked up, Alex grabbed it before it could hit my face.

"What is it?" I asked Alex and he laughed.

"Someone just threw you a set of car keys. And from the back it's a Volvo." I growled. Edward. Then something caught my eye, right in front of us was a car with a piece of paper on the front.

'Right here, Bella' the paper said. Alex caught sight of it too and laughed. I didn't see what was so funny. I didn't need Edward taking care of me! I could also tell the car was _his_.

"I'm guessing this is Edward's doing?" Alex asked me, still chuckling. We started walking toward the car.

"Oh yes. That is definitely Edward." I said as I got into the driver seat. The car smelt just like Edward. So much like Edward, that I felt as if he was there with me. Alex swiftly threw his luggage in the back, as I started the car and headed off. Keeping a steady speed of 100 mph after getting out of the airport. Alex and I talked through out the whole drive, catching up on what the other had been doing since I left. Alex had been hanging with the Volturi most of the time.

"So what have you been doing?" He asked and I smiled.

"I have been touring, singing my new albums that had just came out. It's amazing!" I told him. And it was true, touring felt amazing! Knowing so many people love me and loved my music!

"Yea, I think I heard about you many times." I looked over at him. Had he really heard of me?

"Really?"

"Yes. There was this American family that had come to visit and their kids would not stop talking about you! They were always asking to go see one of your concerts." I smiled at this.

"Awww . . . that is cute!" I said, truly flattered.

He asked about what it felt like touring in front of millions of people and I told him all about it. Telling how it felt amazing, scary, and how I was sometimes nervous. Soon we were entering Forks, Washington. The woods and forests so inviting and familiar. I longed to be walking in the depths of them, getting father and father into them. But I kept driving knowing I would be at Charlie's soon. As soon as about 5 minutes I was parking the car besides Charlie's cruiser. I sat there for a second, my hands still on the steering wheel. Alex stayed in the car too, looking at me.

"You okay?"

"Yes, just . . . let's go." I opened the door and stepped out. Charlie met me at the door, hugging me. I grabbed onto him tight, his touch was so very comforting. We pulled back and Charlie saw Alex.

"Who is this?" Alex stepped up, dropping his bags on the porch. He put out a hand and Charlie shook it.

"I'm Alex, sir. Nice, to meet finally meet you Mr. Swan." Alex said, giving Charlie a big smile.

"Please call me Charlie." My dad said. Looking over at me. I just smiled at him.

"Okay, Charlie." Alex said.

"Come in," Charlie shooed us inside, which wasn't such a good idea. Standing and sitting in the front room was the Cullens', Tanya, and Oliver.

"Where do I put my stuff." Alex asked me and I looked over at him. Reluctantly taking my eyes off of everyone else. I noticed I was still holding hands with Alex, but I didn't let go.

"Go put it in my room, its upstairs. You'll know which room." I told him. He let go of my hand and walked human speed up the stairs.

"How many boys are you going to bring back here! Are there any more coming?" Charlie asked me and I busted out laughing. I thought I would joke around. I could see Rose chuckling too.

"Yea, there are 5 more coming. They are on their way." I said and I could hear everyone gasp. This only made me laugh even harder and in the background I could hear Alex chuckling too. "No, of course I'm not bringing anymore boys home! Jeez!" I said and Charlie relaxed a little.

"Oh, okay. Well, everyone has been waiting for you." I looked back at everyone, each one of their eyes on me.

"Hey, everyone! What's up? Anything been _going on_?" I asked. As soon as I said the last sentence their eyes quickly darted away from me. "Fine then!" I said, a smirk playing on my lips. Then I remembered the car.

"Thanks, Edward." He looked up at me. "For the car! Except next time, uh, could you not throw the keys at my _head_!" I walked to the middle of the room, looking at everyone. They were all trying not to look at me. Alex walked down the stairs, taking a stand next to Charlie. I guess, trying to stay out of this mess. Which I didn't blame him.

"So is anyone going to say 'Hi' or 'Nice to see you'? Am I just going to get silence? Man, you people are rude when it comes to greetings." I said, putting my hands on my hips.

"Aren't . . .you mad at me?" Alice asked. I just looked at her.

"No, why would I be? I'm not mad at any of you." And I truly wasn't. But I didn't like some certain people in the same room. Everyone finally looked at me, and I smiled. Looking at my once family, tugged on my heart and made pain coarse through my chest, the aching pounding like a heartbeat. My throat caught and I felt like I was about to cry.

"Oh . . . well then," Alice said, running over and giving me a hug. She hugged me for a few minute, giving me a quick kiss on the cheek before sitting back down.

"That is better! Haha!" I said and Esme walked up to me.

"Bella," She said, bringing me into her. She always felt like a 2nd mom to me. Her feeling so motherly. Actually she felt like my mother since Renee had died.

"Esme! It's so nice to see you again! You look the same!" I said, pulling away from her. She looked at me, taking me in.

"You look the same but so much more grown up!" I laughed.

"Thanks," Jasper got up, walking over to me. I had never really even touched him let alone be this close to him. He grabbed me into a hug and I stiffened. But after a second I relaxed and hugged him back.

"It's really good to see you, Bella! It hasn't been much fun without you!" I laughed at this!

"It's really good to see you too! And it's been boring too!" I told him and he sat back down. Then, before I really knew what was happening someone was holding me and swinging me to and fro. My feet weren't even touching the ground. But then it dawned on me, Emmett.

"I can't breathe!" I said and Emmett's booming laugh filled the house, shaking it.

"Bella! I missed you so much!" He said, not putting me down. I was starting to get dizzy, just one of the many things that come with being only half-vampire **(A/N Yes, Bella is only half-vampire. But you can't even really tell she is only half). **Emmett, finally put me down, this big, goofy smile on his face.

"Emmett! I missed you so much too!" I said, hugging him again, this time I put my arms around his waist. I pulled back and he stood over by Carlisle. I looked over at Rosalie, who sat on the couch with a huge smile. I knew what she was thinking. She got up and nodded her head. I stood in the middle of the room and she stood in front of me. We did a secret hand-shake that we had made up and then bumped butts screaming "VAMPIRE SPEED!" We busted out laughing and hugged each other.

"Bella! I missed you! You are after all my sister!"

"I missed you too, Rose! I know!" We laughed again and stood by each other.

"Oh, I don't like Tanya. At all. There something about her. It seems like she is controlling Edward." Rose said and I looked at her. Then walked over to Carlisle.

"Hi," I said.

"Bella. How have you been doing?" I knew what he was talking about.

"Oh, okay. I've been better though." I told him and he unexpectedly hugged me. It was so nice seeing all of them again. I had missed them so much, wanting to see them again but never knowing where they had went. I guess to Denali with Tanya. We let go and I stepped back and went to stand over by Rosalie.

"So, why is everyone here at the same time? Not that I don't want you guys here, it's just a shock." I said and everyone smiled.

"Bella," The Cullens' except for Tanya and Edward said. "We want you to come live with us for a little bit." I could feel the shock on my face as I took in their words. Live with them?

"Why?" I asked, Edward and Tanya was going to be with them most likely and I didn't know if I could handle it.

"We all miss you so badly and want you to come spend some time with us. We are planning on moving back into the old house here." They said and my mouth fell open. Move back _here_? "I know that there is some tension between you, Edward, and Tanya but you could sort it out with them." Esme said. I could see it in her eyes that she wanted me to move in with them. What was I going to do?

Everything that reminded me of Edward pierced through me with pain, how would I stand living in the same house as them!? Seeing them every day . . . touching, kissing, make . . .

I looked at Esme and gave her a answer.

* * *

CLIFFY! Now, those of you who know how i write, almost every chapter is a cliffy. haha... i hope you liked this chapter!

Review and tell me what you thought!

So go ahead and press that little review buttton , you know you want to! :)

Love you guys so much XOXOXO

-taylorcullenforever


	11. Stupid Decision

** Okay, i had this chapter written up and done about 2 weeks ago! But, i had it on my dad's computer**

**and just completely forgot about it.**

**So sorry about that.**

**Anyway, this chapter was kind of fun to write, seeing as Bella's actions in this chapter are like stupid, haha.**

**But, i hope you like the chapter.**

**And thanks so much for waiting so patiently again.**

**-taylorcullenforever**

* * *

"I—." Esme cut my off, frantically holding her hands up.

"Wait! Before you answer. If you want Alex can stay with you too. We don't mind." This shocked me. Did they really miss me that much. In a way the Cullens made me feel eternally missed. I missed they so much too, but would I be able to make it living with them? I looked over at Tanya, as if seeing her for the first time, and saw that she was fixed and fine with both arms and legs. I quietly snarled. I had hoped to do her some permanent damage.

I went back to thinking if I would make it living with them. On the bright side I could take Alex with me. That was one good offer and I wanted to catch up with them, I really did. My heart was being torn, trying to decide whether to back out now and say not or to just invite the pain and say yes.

"You having a battle with yourself, Bella?" Emmett asked and I smiled at him. That was so Emmett like.

"Esme, I . . . just . . . don't know." I said, honestly. I wasn't sure what to do or what to pick. Living with them might not be as bad as I was picturing it to be.

"Oh," Esme's face fell and she looked at the ground as if she thought she was stupid for even asking the question. "That's fine then."

"Yes." I blurted out, surprised by my own action. "I'll stay with you guys." The rest of the words flowed out, without my consent. I shook my head.

"Really?" Esme was looking at me again, this time smiling so wide I could have sworn it hurt.

"Yes, no, hold on." What was I getting myself in!? I was absolutely nuts agreeing to this after just finding out that Edward had been cheating with Tanya! Was I becoming masochistic? That thought fluttered through my mind, but quickly vanishing as my attention was brought back to the Cullens' who were all staring at me. I was stuck, plain stuck! There was the option stay with them, tell them to let you think for a few days, or not go at all. Which were the same as invite the pain, think about wanting the pain or running away from it, or running away from the pain.

I thought from a different angle. If none of this Edward cheating and being with Tanya would I stay with them? The answer was simple and pure. Yes. There was no doubt in my mind that I wouldn't say yes to them if none of this had happened.

I could feel a sheet of sweat covering my neck and palms. They all sat there in front of my awaiting my answer and looking at me with such anticipating faces. I had to make a decision and now.

"Okay . . . fine. I'll live with you guys for awhile." My voice was a whisper that sounded pained and undecided. I looked down at the floor, the thought of having to see Edward and Tanya touching each other and kissing. . . .Venom was building up in my eyes, making me blink rapidly to try and hide them.

"Are you sure?" Alice said, her voice calm and less chirpy. No. No, I wasn't. I mouthed no but I was looking down at the floor. They didn't see the word.

"Yes." I could feel the venom was gone and I looked up, putting on my best fake smile. I had just completely screwed myself over. My head was pounding with so many thoughts and pictures swirling around. Thoughts of earlier days when Edward would kiss me, kiss my neck, my hands, everywhere. Where he would say 'I love you' in his velvety voice, never giving away any sign of those words being _false_. I quickly shook my head, clearing any sound, picture, feeling, or thoughts of those days. I swallowed hard, I'm sure they heard it.

"I . . ." I stopped, what was I suppose to do now. My mouth turned into a straight-line. I already felt odd and out of place. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Alex step toward me. His hand stretched out toward me.

"What happens now." I said rephrasing it. Saying 'What do I do now' would have given me away with how uncomfortable I was, already.

"The choice is up to you. You could stay here and chat with Charlie and Alex. You could come over with us and put your stuff away. Whatever you want." I took the first option, thanking my lucky stars, so happy to be able to get away from their dazzling faces to think straight. I smiled politely at all of them.

"I think I'm going to catch up with Charlie for a little bit." My shoulder slumped as if a big weight had been lifted.

"Okay, that is fine." Esme walked over to me, once again, hugging me. This time everyone could see my face and I couldn't compose my face. Her skin reminded me of moments way back then between Edward and I.

I could feel the emotions on my face as everyone looked at me. Scared, embarrassment, sad, and lost. I saw everyone's faces turn sad as they finally understood I wasn't too happy about what I had just agreed to.

In a instant I felt happy, well somewhat happy. Enough to get a genuine smile on. Jasper! This made me smile even more. I looked over at him, he had a nice smile on. I muttered a 'thank you' and he muttered a 'we are going to talk later'. My face fell, but only for a couple of seconds. Esme let me go and I smiled at her.

"I'll see you later." I said, waving at everyone else.

"Just come on down, when you're done talking with Charlie." Great. I suppressed a groan.

"Will do."

They all left, leaving Charlie, Alex and I to finally relax. I was back to being the old Bella.

I fell down onto the couch, letting out a big whoosh of breath. I placed a hand on my forehead.

"Will someone please SLAP ME!" I said, sitting up and turning my cheek toward them. But Charlie and Alex stood there.

"Okay, then. Don't." Alex gave me a stern look.

"Why did you just do that?" Alex said, his tone disapproving. I looked at my hands, not meeting his eyes.

"I--." I stopped, not knowing why I did that. "I don't know." I finally met his eyes, but to my surprise they were soft and gentle. The gold a liquid gold.

"Bella!" He laughed. What was so funny?

"What!" I demanded.

"I could see the pain on your face the whole entire time and yet you agree to stay with them." I pouted, of course Alex was going to tell me how stupid I was. Of course. I scowled at him. The last thing I wanted right at the moment was Alex telling me what a mistake of a choice I had just made.

"Nah you couldn't!" I disagreed! No, I had composed my face! I was sure of it.

"Yes, I could! Would you like to see." Alex held out his hand. That was one of my special powers. I got Aro's power. To be able to read the minds of anyone who touched my hands. Except I could only see what they were thinking at the moment. Unless they gave me full access to their heads.

"What?" Charlie asked, completely baffled. I had almost forgotten he was here.

"Just a power of mine."

"What kind of power. Is it like mine?" Charlie eyes lit up, sparkling in the dim light of the house. I shook my head.

"I can't tell when people are lying or telling the truth like you can Mr. Lie Detector Test! But, I can read someone's mind as long as I am touching them. I usually don't use it though." Charlie looked surprised.

"Wow, that is awesome." Did my ears just hear right? Did Charlie just say 'awesome'? I chuckled at Charlie's comment but turned back to Alex.

"I'm so screwed!" Alex nodded.

"You kind of are. But I'm going to be moving in with you, so hopefully that will keep you from falling apart."

"Yea,"

Charlie, Alex and I caught up on things. Talking about anything and everything. It was nice to forget about my decision or where I would be later on today. I was content for most of the time.

But the thoughts of what had happened a few minutes earlier was always swimming around in the back of my head. Waiting . . . just waiting to pop up.

* * *

**Okay, so Bella choose to be stupid and invite the pain and GO LIVE WITH THE CULLENS!! AHH!**

**How smart.**

**Any who, please review and tell me what you thought.**

**I will be writing another chapter this weekend (for sure)**

**Okay,review!!**

**Love you guys,**

**XOXOXOXO**

**-taylorcullenforever**


	12. AN

**Hey Everyone,**

**I know i haven't updated this story in the longest freaking time**

**but i'm at a moot point right now**

**But i'm hoping that if i re-read back over the stuff i have written at the moment**

**I can get out a new chapter.**

**If anyone has any ideas for further chapters**

**PLEASE REVIEW or PM me.**

**New chapter may be up by late tonight.**

**Tomorrow evening is the deadline**

**Thanks!**

**-taylorcullenforever**


	13. Already Gone

New Chappy!

Here we go:

* * *

Alex stood beside me, both of our heads tilted to the side, as we stared at the huge, white house standing before us.

"This is where they live?"

"Yep." The word made a popping sound when I said the "p" and Alex glanced over at me.

"We're going to be just fine." He reassured me, moving behind me so that his hand moved me forward. My legs started and I left my calves' uplift then drop as I climbed the stairs.

"You know what I could go for right now?" Alex cocked an eyebrow at me. He shook his head and rang the doorbell, holding his bags in one hand while holding the screen door open with the other. I stood a good foot behind him.

"A huge gallon of ice cream with cherries and caramel syrup." He laughed at me and shifted his weight from one foot to the other as the door swung open.

In front of us stood a frantic looking Alice, her hair everything and her eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights. My lips puckered and I tried to contain the laughter that was bubbling excessively.

Alice tried her best to quickly smooth her hair before pushing the door open more and standing back so we could come in.

I smiled her and pressed a quick kiss onto her cheek, letting her know that I knew she and Jasper had been at it only moments ago and that even though that makes me sick, I still love her as a sister.

Alex stood there dejectedly waiting for me to stand beside him. Even though I was the one that was sure to be suffering throughout this entire stay, Alex knew no one. Meaning that we had to stick together.

I owed him that much.

I let my eyes wander around now that we were inside and to my surprise _everything_ looked the same. The piano was still in its exact place, as well as the couches, TV, just everything I could remember.

"Excuse me," Alice murmured and I waved her away with my hand. She flitted off and up the stairs, leaving a baffled Alex and an already panicked me to figure out something to do with ourselves.

I smoothed my hand over Alex's pushing the tips of my fingers through the space between his fingers till our hands were latched together. He squeezed but kept studying the place.

I felt the need to sit down and write a song but I knew that would have to wait till later.

I drop my bags right where I'm standing and start for the kitchen. Alex followed my lead—leaving his bags—and trailed behind me still looking around. I smiled at how cute Alex looked at the moment but soon turned my attention to the buzzing refrigerator.

Pulling the door back, I took out a fresh bottle of Coke—when did they get this?—and got out a glass, pouring to the rim. I put the bottle back and took a long, drawn out sip. The rush of cold against the back of my throat calmed me and I could feel the liquid spill into my stomach.

This is just what I needed. A good glass of Coke.

"Ah, there she is!" I hear someone call out and I look up from my glass to find Emmett staring at me.

I swing Alex's and my intertwined hands together, rubbing my thumb over the back of his hand.

Emmett sees our hands and his brow furrows in confusion but I can tell he's going to leave the question he wants to ask alone.

I smile and let go of Alex's hands as I grasp my glass in one hand. I give Emmett a hug then stand next to him, leaning against the wall.

I gulp a larger sip then last time and sigh.

"What's up?" I ask, hoping he had something we could talk about.

Anything that would be a distraction.

He shrugs and I gaze over at Alex who's staring at his opened cell phone.

I wonder if he has a girlfriend . . .

" . . .think that it's crazy." I shake my head and turn to Emmett, a apologetic smile plastered across my lips.

"You weren't listening were you?" I shook my head but placed a hand on his arm.

"I was just thinking about certain thing." I stared into Emmett's eyes, hoping he would catch on and understand. I didn't want him thinking I wasn't paying attention because he was boring.

"Ooh," He said, his mouth shaping a perfect O. I nodded and he continued again with his story.

"What I was saying," He bent down, low, whispering in my ear. "Is that I do NOT like Tanya. She's weird. Something not right about her." I backed away from him, not in the mood to handle him talking about Tanya.

My God, the last thing I wanted to think about is Tanya.

Emmett, I wish you had a brain sometimes.

I knew he didn't intentionally mean to hurt me.

"Okay?" My face turned into disgust and Emmett patted my shoulder. Turning around and walking off.

So much for a good start with Emmett.

Crap.

"She's in the kitchen." I heard Emmett bellow, and I rolled my eyes. Alex smiled and came over to me, pulling me into his.

In a matter of seconds, his hand was on my hip, my hand was on his shoulder, and our other hands were together.

He rocked us back and forth in a attempt to dance so I went along with it and we swirled around, my hair floating back behind me.

I laughed and he dipped my low, my eye still glued to his.

He leaned even closer to me and I was sure he was going to kiss me.

Part of me wanted him to.

He pulled back and spun me away from him just as Alice came bouncing into the room.

"Alice." I said, looking down at my empty hand. Realizing Alex must have put my soda down, I picked it back up from the counter, and glanced back over to Alice.

She smiled and clapped her hands together, obviously excited about something.

"What?" I asked.

"I'm just excited you're finally back with us. As a family again."

"I hate to burst you're bubble but Alice, we're not really a family . . . _anymore_." She frowned and slapped my on the arm lightly.

"Gosh, Bella. Crush my happiness bubble why don't cha'?!" I smile and she watches me finish off the rest of my soda.

"You still actually like that?"

"Yep. It's my lover." I had to laugh shakily at this and hoped she didn't notice how uptight I sounded.

God, I can't figure out how to loosen up.

Alice stares at me and soon, pushes me back into the living room. Jasper and Emmett are watching TV, along with Rosalie who is settled on Emmett's lap. I smile at them, waving slightly.

Alex follows us and I pick my bags back up.

Thanking Alice, I head for the stairs. I stop and turn around making sure Alex is with me. He's standing on the step behind me and I smile.

"Thanks."

"Anytime Bella." I sigh and go into my old bedroom, one I'd been given by Edward. It looked the same and I could tell Alice had had fun decorating the place. The walls were a dark red and the futon and the bed were coordinated with colors like the red.

Beautiful.

I would have to thank her later.

I plop my bags onto the bed and instantly dig around in one bag, looking for my song spiral.

Finding it, I pull it out and flip to a clean page, almost jumping out of my skin as Alex enters my room.

"You find your room okay?" I asked, realizing I'd left him.

Shit.

"Yea, Alice let me in on where it was." He looked sternly at me then came to sit on the floor, right next to me.

"You going to write a new song?"

"Mmhmm," I murmur, pulling out a pencil from the pocket in the front of my bag.

I hum a tune for a little bit, changing it here and there.

Realizing I'm not going to get very far with just my voice, I grab the bag holding my guitar. I unzip it and pull it out. Placing it in my lap and playing certain cords.

Edward enters the room, knocking lightly before I nod at him. He settles himself on the bed, already knowing what I'm doing.

I close my eyes knowing they're going to distract me but then I peek at Edward and it all comes to me.

I start writing out the words, stopping now and then to play a few cords. Trying to get it to sound just right.

Opening my mouth, I start to sing. Quietly and gracefully. My voice holding all the emotion I've been wanting to share with everyone.

Every ounce of hurt and love leaking from my soul.

Or so I thought.

**"Remember all the things we wanted  
Now all our memories, they're haunted  
We were always meant to say goodbye  
Even without fists held high, yeah  
Never would have worked out right, yeah  
We were never meant for do or die**

**I didn't want us to burn out  
I didn't come here to hurt you now  
I can't stop**

**I want you to know  
That it doesn't matter  
Where we take this road  
Someone's gotta go  
And I want you to know  
You couldn't have loved me better  
But I want you to move on  
So I'm already gone**

**Looking at you makes it harder  
But I know that you'll find another  
That doesn't always make you wanna cry  
Started with a perfect kiss  
Then we could feel the poison set in  
Perfect couldn't keep this love alive**

**You know that I love you so  
I love you enough to let you go**

**I want you to know  
That it doesn't matter  
Where we take this road  
Someone's gotta go  
And I want you to know  
You couldn't have loved me better  
But I want you to move on  
So I'm already gone**

**I'm already gone  
I'm already gone  
You can't make it feel right  
When you know that it's wrong  
I'm already gone  
Already gone  
There's no moving on  
So I'm already gone**

**Already gone  
already gone  
already gone, Oooo, oh  
Already gone  
already gone  
already gone, yeah**

**Remember all the things we wanted  
Now all our memories, they're haunted  
We were always meant to say goodbye**

**I want you to know  
That it doesn't matter  
Where we take this road  
Someone's gotta go  
And I want you to know  
You couldn't have loved me better  
But I want you to move on  
So I'm already gone**

**I'm already gone  
I'm already gone  
You can't make it feel right  
When you know that it's wrong  
I'm already gone  
Already gone  
There's no moving on  
So I'm already gone..."  
**

**(Already Gone by Kelly Clarkson)**

Opening my eyes, I take in a deep breath, before glancing over at Edward.

He gives me that half-smile and I feel my insides tighten.

Why can't I just not love him?

Why do I love him still?

* * *

I surprisingly got this chapter done!

And i think i know where this story is going--finally!

So i will be updating soon for sure!

Review and tell me what you guys think!

Thanks everyone!

XOXOXOXO

-taylorcullenforever


	14. Love Come Down

Another New Chappy

Here We Go:

* * *

Both Edward and Alex stared at me and I felt like a bug being examined under both of their piercing eyes.

I smiled and held in my breath waiting for someone to say something.

I hadn't exactly wanted Edward to be in the same room when I'd made and sung that song. But I guess I should thank him for inspiring me with that song.

No, then he'd know that all those words had come from my heart; each one about him.

There was no way that that was happening. Over my dead body—haha.

Alex began to clap, a smile spreading across his face. I licked my chapped lips and felt like a blush was creeping up my neck. Even though I couldn't blush doesn't mean I didn't feel like I was at times.

"That was great. You're going to have to make a copy of that for me." I felt embarrassed and ran my hand through my hair, in hopes that it would calm me down.

I needed another soda.

Alex held out his hand and I knew what he was doing. I placed my hand over his just lightly and closed my eyes. His thoughts rushing through my arm and screaming at me in my head.

_What the heck is Edward doing in here?_

I shrugged and let my fingers brush over Alex's for a few more seconds before pulling back.

Alex looked over to Edward and Edward did not look happy. I scowled at Alex, he was saying something that—of course—was going to upset Edward, and since we were all living together now. I did not want anyone made at anyone else.

That was just asking for trouble.

Edward looked longingly at me and I stared back, my face hard and my eyes cold. His shoulders caved in and he left the room but not before turning back one last time to look at me.

This was going to be hard. Way harder than I thought.

"God Dammit." I said aloud, looking down at my lap and shaking my head. This is just what I needed—Edward pulling me under again.

"What?" Alex asked and I turned to look at him. Venom tears were building in my eyes and I felt overwhelmed with a mixture of emotions. My hands were shaking despite the fact that I wanted them to.

My lips pressed into a straight line and I blinked my eyes, almost rocking back and forth.

Alex reached out to me, his hand stretched and his palm open. I stared at it and knew that if I took it I would just be dragging Alex into all of this. Neither of us needed that to happen. But then again, I had already pulled him into all of it.

He was staying with me, to live out this sadistic rollarcoaster ride.

Shaking my head even more, I took his palm into my hand and brought it to my mouth. My lips puckering as I kissed it softly before letting it go. I stood up and walked toward the window, watching as the fallen leaves from the trees whipped around in the wind.

Moments like this made me think being here was worth it. A recollection of memories that had haunted me for the longest times. A recollection of feelings that flooded me, almost as if drowning me silently.

I felt Alex's hand slip onto my hip, sliding around so that his arms were circles around my waist. The warmth radiating from his body was comforting but at the same time the coolness that also came from his body released memories of Edward and I from the vault I kept closed inside my head.

In an instant one memory clouded my eyes, only the yellow brightness from the light of the sun reminding me I was still in the Cullen' house.

* * *

_The Memory:_

_Edward throws me onto the bed, ripping off not only my pants and top but also my underwear. He drops his boxers and his hands are everywhere. The coldness of them intense and exciting. _

_He cups my ankles, sliding up my legs, circling over my knees. I look down to see his pale white knuckles when he turns his fingers to trace my sacred area. One no boy had ever gotten to. _

_Shoving inside of me, my eyes roll back in my head, and I buck forward wanting more._

* * *

I gasp, shocked, and pull away from Alex so abruptly he almost falls forward from being a second away from leaning into me. He spins toward me, his eyes full of wonder, and I feel like I'm going to hurl.

Running for the door, I descend down the stairs, greeting the refrigerator before opening it and pouring myself another glass of Coke.

I don't wait for the bubbles to fizzle down instead folding my lips over the edge of the glass and downing down a good gulp, bubbles and all.

I inhale some air and finish off the glass before slamming it down on the counter.

Alice, Jasper, Rose, Emmett, and Edward are staring at me like I'd grown two heads and I smile gracefully. Waving so that they'd stop looking at me so weird. Alice twirls a lock of her hair around her finger, giving me this look of knowing. Edward's just staring at me but Emmett, Jasper, and Rose look at me sympathetically. Like they are feeling my pain—well Jasper can but the others I think not!

"You okay there, Bella?" Alice asks, her eyes wondering over me. I sigh loudly and stand straight with my hands on my hips.

"Never been better." I lie, whistling the tune for my next song before maneuvering myself through them. The living room is empty but I still feel the sensation of their eyes crawling all over me and I shudder.

Curving to the right I walk to the backyard and find that they've gotten themselves a pool put in.

Hmm, something that's different.

I open the back door and start for the pool, my mind only on the cool and turquoise water.

Stripping down to my underwear and bra, I dive into the deep end.

Not caring who saw me almost completely naked as I let the water wrap itself around my body, nothing else touching me. No memories, no videos, no hands or feelings. Just the water and me.

In perfect harmony.

* * *

As we can all see Bella is going through a really rough time,

ahh yes.

Edward is not making things any easier and Alex wants to help but seems to remind Bella of things she doesnt want to remember.

So sad.

I'll have another chapter up soon!

Review please! Let me know how i'm doing

love you guys

-taylorcullenforever


	15. Just You and Me

**A/N** **PLEASE READ:** This story has now become one of my favorites. Now i know this story isn't that great to start with seeing as i've become a MUCH better writer in the months i've spent letting it gather dust. So bear with me and just KEEP READING! I promise it gets better. I've taken everyone's POV into consideration and found that this story has become the questions we ask ourselves in life. The foundation of every ones own self.

Don't give up on this story just yet, for it's only just turned into something worthy of reading.

:D

-taylorcullenforever

* * *

**Bella**

How do you keep a friend a friend when the possibility of loving him as more and being happy with him is higher than anything else in life?

"La…la…la." I say, changing the channel with the TV remote. I settle for America's Funniest Home Videos, almost spewing a sip of soda when a kid goes flying into the air because he landed on the trampoline wrong. Ouch, that had to hurt. But to have such a memory on tape would be nice, knowing you could watch it years later and remember exactly how you felt flying so high.

"You're such a couch potato." Alex says, switching the book he's reading from his left hand to his right. I stare up at him from my position on the couch, wriggling my feet in his lap. He cracks a smile but doesn't look up from the page. Instead, his left hand rubbing over my skin soothingly.

"Uhh, whatever! You're just too energetic. Like Alice. She never stops, just keeps on running." Alex finally looks at me, eyes full of laughter. I pout, before crawling closer to him, his warmth inviting. I watch the TV a bit more, until I find it too boring. I sigh, lying back against the cushions. What to do, what to do?

"Where is everyone?" He asks, putting his book down on the stand beside the couch. I watch him as he easily picks me up, spreads himself out along the couch, and then places me against his chest. I smile lightly, kissing his collarbone before snuggling closer. That's the thing about Alex. He understood me, got that there are moments when cuddling with me is the best thing to do. Like now, when I just needed to know someone cared.

"Out hunting. It's just you and me." I tell him, closing my eyes. Fatigue is getting the best of me. Lately I'd been having trouble sleeping at night, especially since I was being beaten down by stress. Trying to decide who was going to be the love of your life—the one fighting for—does not come off as an easy decision.

I kept asking myself what I really wanted. What I really craved. Edward was always in the way of my rational thinking. It seemed with him in the picture I couldn't see myself with anyone but him. Even if he had cheated with Tanya.

Tanya. Another problem that seems to always get in the way. Though the story was that Tanya had been sleeping with Edward while we had been a couple, then the reason he'd left me, I didn't believe it. I'd been spending a bit of time with her and she was not normal. She was always on edge, glancing behind her back, choosing her words carefully around us—me especially.

What if she had a power that had somehow made Edward do the things he had? Then Edward would no longer be to blame for his actions. Making the option of being with him again bigger than the two options of being with Oliver and Alex. Though, I don't think Alex feels that way toward me.

I wasn't sure on whether I felt more than friendly feelings for Alex, either. It was questionable. I'd known Alex for years now. He had helped me through tough times, but so had Oliver. At least Alex was Edward's brother. That made it all less complicated. When I thought about Oliver being Edward's brother, I get angry with Oliver for not having told me. God, there were so many lies. Lies built up from all these years.

"What do you want to do?" Alex asks, placing a lock of hair behind my ear. I shrug my shoulders against his body, nose inhaling his scent. He smelt like cherries, this cause laughter to bubble up in me, spewing out. I slapped a hand over my mouth trying to stop it but Alex heard it. His fingers tickled my sides, begging me to scream 'uncle'.

"What's so funny?" He mocks, trapping me in his arms. I thrash around from the feeling his fingers are leaving behind. My feet kick the end of the couch, sending us bouncing lightly. "What's so funny, hmm?" He asks once more, kissing my head as his fingers let up, instead freezing there on my hips.

"You smell like cherries. Ooh, that makes you even more delectable." I burst out in laughter as he tries to hide his embarrassment. If he could blush he'd be the color of the paper wrapping around a Coke bottle.

"Shut up." I place a hand upon his cheek, smoothing his lips from the form of a pout.

"Let's go to the aquarium." Alex stares at me like I've gone crazy. I jump up from the couch, running into the backroom to find my purse. Alex tags behind me, handing me my back as I bend down for it. I smile; searching for the spare wad of cash I kept with me at all time. When I find it I pull out two hundred for tickets and drinks for me.

"Really? You want to do to the aquarium." I nod my head vigorously, hand latching onto his so that I can shake his arm up and down. I feel like a child.

"Yes! I haven't been to one in forever! Plus, it will be fun! Ever been to one?"

"No." I gasp, this time feigning everything but shock. Okay, that's it. We are for sure going.

"You're going to love it." I pull him from the house, leaving the door unlocked and the TV still playing.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The Seattle Aquarium is small compared to ones I've been to in Florida when touring there. But I smile nonetheless, tugging on Alex's hand to get him to go faster. Of all the times he decides he wants to walk at a human pace, he chooses the moment I'm all hyped up about visiting this place.

We enter through two large doors, finding ourselves surrounded by walls painted with fish and sharks and dolphins. The blue coloring that's the base of the background makes everything seem especially blue.

We walk through a small hallway, before entering their souvenir shop that's full of things you can buy. The ticket booth is to our left, right past the first few selves of items. Looking around, I see art by the dolphins here and point it out to Alex. He studies the sand dollars painted by the dolphins then glances at me.

"If I had to pay for that, I would want to be done by a _real _artist." I slap him on the arm, mouth dropping from his rude comment. He laughs at my face before picking up a stuffed turtle and shoving it in my face. I slap it away, beaming at the lady behind the ticket booth.

I tuck the remaining money into my jeans, pushing through the doors to find myself staring at a thick circular wall painted—again—blue. There are windows spread out across the circumference of the circle. I step close enough till I realize it's a swimming pool for the dolphins and we're standing outside, looking in at them through windows.

There are only three dolphins, which are swimming endlessly around the deep pool. Alex tucks an arm around me, pressing his face against the glass as the dolphins disappear from our sight.

I stand up on my toes, searching for them. They appear out of nowhere, swimming directly in front of our window, so close that if the wall wasn't there I'd be able to reach out and touch them.

The water reflects strips of white light against their gray bodies, making them glow almost as their flippers move about in front of us. Alex stares baffled at me, eyes wide with excitement. I knew he'd love it here.

We move on after a bit, finding ourselves staring at a group of tropical penguins. One dives into the water, swimming over to eye us. His body is small and his face is cute. Alex bends down to get a closer look, a smile playing on his lips. I study the ones huddle in a small cave that have built, eyes also on us.

"This is awesome." Alex says, watching as I take a sip of Coke from my 32 oz. Bottle that cost me about ten dollars since it was souvenir one. I nod in agreement, smiling as we head off toward the alligators.

"I've also heard about one of these but never been and now that i have--" He looks over at me. "We have to do this again, promise me." For a second I think I hear a double-meaning to his words. But when he bends down to brush his lips across my forehead and down the slope of my nose, I decide it's best not to dig too deep into his words.

They look pitiful in their small containers. Tiny fish swim along with them in the pools of water in their cages. One stares up at us, moving around, while the other sleeps soundly.

"They creep me out." I tell Alex, as we start off again.

"I think they're awesome. Their teeth kinda freak me out!" We laugh together, staring up at adorable seals. I wait a second, before glueing myself back into his form, cut out to match my body perfectly--like I was made to fit there. Made for the purpose of being with Alex.

"I promise." I say, stopping in my tracks as I realize i've promised for than I ever intended to. I can't take it back, not only would Alex catch onto why I took back my promise--it would give me away.

How do you keep a friend a friend when the possibility of loving him as more and being happy with him is higher than anything else in life? You hold on tight to what you have with him because falling in love with him is something you can't exactly control.

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I will be updating soon again for i've actually gotten seven other chapters already written--unbelievable!

so REVIEW and let me know what you really think. :D

-taylorcullenforever


	16. Tip Of My Tongue

**Edward**

How do you erase the past and start fresh when the love of your life has been crushed by the things you've chosen to do?

I have truly fucked up. Half of it was my own fault while the other half I had nothing to do with. Seeing Bella after so many years was like strapping myself onto a jet, flying straight into the sun, only to let the sun cook me to death inside of a fire made on purpose. I always pictured myself spending years alone then finding someone. Marrying the woman of my dreams and settling down so that eternity no longer seems like hell instead of just simply living. I had that dream for a bit, when I was _with_ Bella. Her being never caused me pain only happiness and I'd never gotten to show or tell her that.

I remember how it felt standing next to her. The warmth that seeped into my veins in doses, the butterflies that caged around in my belly before swimming upward to close up my throat. It was love and I believe that. Except I fucked up and lost it all. I had to self-loathe myself and worry about her till it became I constant subject—protect Bella. Worry about Bella. Make sure Bella has this and that. I ruined half of our time together by smothering her in a blanket of protection. Looking at her now? She's perfectly find, adding to the fact that she never really needed my protection.

All though she was vampire now, no longer human. Did that mean I failed as my job as her protector? I didn't exactly think so, for she might have chosen to be turned. If so then her being vampire made me happy, for it would have made her happy. Yet, seeing her now, no longer human, made me want to cry tears that came to flood the Nile River.

How could I tell her that I ended up with Tanya for a reason I cannot say? If I told her the truth she'd laugh at me then scream because she was sure I was lying. Covering up my lies with a bogus story about how Tanya did this and that. How I never got an escape route to come back to Bella. How I stilled loved her.

Is love supposed to hurt so much you find yourself cringing at every little thing that brings up old memories? Like when Bella first told me she loved me, when we sat under the stars onto of the firehouse roof.

_Bella places her head in the crook of my neck, nuzzling as she sighs happily. Above us are thousands of shining dots, which cover everything. I turn my body closer to Bella's hoping that she doesn't mind the cold. She's so warm, inviting. Cars are passing below us, their headlights giving us views of trees and shrubs that surround the building._

_"Edward?" She asks, fingers crinkling my shirt as she holds on. I smooth back her hair, kissing a puckered scare that sits directly above her left eyebrow. One she'd gained while fishing with me._

_"Yes?" I brace myself for something unknown. Whether it's a statement or question or assumption, part of me afraid it's something serious. Something that will cause me to lie to her._

_"Do you love me?" She whispers, becoming a statue in my arms for a second while I stupidly think this over. I should have answered straight away, blowing away her doubts and fears like those oversized fans that are used in gyms—that can blow you over with their force._

_"Why?" I ask, beating around the bush. It's not that I don't love her. It's that fact that I don't know how she feels towards me. Where you have to watch your step as you find yourself stepping over rocks that hang in mid-air, waiting for you to step on the wrong one. So they can fall, bringing you down with them._

_"Because—you're you and I'm me. What if I end up loving you more than you love me?" Her questions rhetorical, for neither of us know the answer. All we know is that right now, there's more to this relationship than we've let on in the past months._

_"I do love you." I say. Bella relaxes gradually, taking my words to the heart. Using them to persuade herself that my words are all she needs to know that she'll never get hurt. That's a lie, she's knows that._

When you love someone, you give your entire being to him or her. Whether they know it. Whether you even know it. You surrender to the world, finding that so many things can go wrong. That somewhere so many things can go right. You just have to decide which to care about more—the good or the bad?

How do you erase the past and start fresh when the love of your life has been crushed by the things you've chosen to do? You hold onto every moment you made with them, reliving every one, and love her the rest of your life until it's enough—whether she knows it or not.

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A/N This time it's Edward POV. This chapter was a pleasure to right, seeing as Edward searches for answers to how to love, live, and save himself all over again.

REVIEWS = LOVE

-taylorcullenforever


	17. Never Enough

**Tanya**

How do you hold onto something you know you were never meant to have?

I know she hates me. It's not hard to see, and I can understand why she hates me. I took Edward away from her. I went to extremes to get the boy with me. Now that I have him by my side I can't let me him slip up—I can't let him get away. I've done a lot of things in my life that I regret and becoming a vampire was one of them. I don't think any of us—humans—on earth realize how much we give up for certain things until we're standing alone and needing.

I think part of my want for Edward is because I know I can't have him. Well I couldn't have him when he was with Bella. When I look into his eyes I see that he still loves her. Yes, it hurts but there are other matters more pressing than the fact that he's yet to warm up to me. I've always needed someone to love me. Half of its from the fact that my parents were never really there for me, always off doing something else while me and my sister stayed home.

Edward was really just a distraction. One that I could—well keep for myself. Distraction helped fight all the endless hours that merged together into days. Forever was getting to me and I needed something more to help it all pass by. Edward had fought with me in the beginning, when he was still with Bella. I'd hunted him down, asked him—sort of begged—him to just give me a chance. To stop pretending he was in love with a _human_! What vampire falls for a human?

Guilty is what I felt once I'd gotten him to do what I wanted. Though, even once we'd had sex, I knew he hadn't really want to do it. Bella hadn't even known either, which made me feel even guiltier. Then I was embarrassed for feeling guilty because I deserved Edward. I was gorgeous, perfect. I deserved more than I was getting. If so, then why did no one see that?

It's all part of a cycle. Love, hate, loss, anger, forgiveness, deception. It's a loop we go through every single day. Winter might be full of forgiveness for something, becoming closer to something. While spring might end up being full of hate and deception, learning that we don't know our friends as well as we thought. Rolling into summer, the heat might bring on a hurricane full of loss and love, accepting your wish to the stars with the love of your life, who you loose a bit after realizing how much you depend on them. Fall—the only remaining season—might just be all of that. Full of everything you can ever feel, because shit happens.

Life shapes itself and you're thrown off balance. Say, one day you might be a happily married, 34 year old with two kids. The next day you could be a soon-to-be-divorced woman thats now a whopping 56 physically, from being beaten down, with one kid since the others off to stay with their father.

It wasn't fair. It really wasn't.

Watching Edward as he hunted sent my eye stinging without the release of tears. I gritted my teeth together, knowing I should have better control of my emotions. He stops drinking from the deer he's caught, looking up as if in search for something. I've never exactly understood the things Edward does, or understood why he does the thing he does. My first meet with Edward was different than any meeting I've ever had with anyone else. He was beautiful, a pure gentlemen that had been raised right. He had been distant, closed-off, and independent.

The Edward that stood before me now was the same, however just in pain. I could see the pain swimming in his pupils, skimming the surface but never fully coming out. Sitting down on a rock, I watch him walk over to a tree, hand skimming over the rough bark. Does that tree remind him of something? Is it a special tree? He seems to get chocked up, slamming his head down on the trunk, arms wrapping around the base. So he's a tree hugger? Huh, I never knew.

Flitting over to him, I sweep my hair off my shoulders before hugging my body to his. He stiffens, causing my heart to swell with hurt. How can he be so impartial toward me when he knows I just want him to feel the way I do?

"What do you want, Tanya?" He mumbles, pulling away instantly. I stutter for the right words, eyes begging him to look at me. Just look at me, I think before I realize I've done it. He shakes his head.

"You ruined us, Tanya. You ruined me and you ruined yourself." I blanch at his words, a stabbing sensation filling my gut. I never ruined us! I did not ruin him! I wouldn't have done what I'd done if I knew it would ruin him.

"I made us!" I retort, grabbing onto his arm. He snaps it away from me, turning around and walking toward me with such anger in his eyes, I consider running away. Maybe I should give him some space. What if he explodes on me?

"It was _never enough_ for you!" He says, pointing a finger at me. I walk backward, trying to figure out a plan as I feel my back come into contact with a tree. Edward places his hands a few inches out from the sides of my head, cornering me. Though, if we were about to make love and he was trying to seduce me at the moment I wouldn't mind being in this predicament.

"What was never enough?" I ask, never looking away from his eyes.

"You and me being _just friends _was _never enough_. You had to make it be more than it should have ever been." With that, he lifts a hand almost as if to slap me before flitting away from me.

Someone clears his or her throat to my left. I jump in fright before realizing the Cullens—all of them—are standing at the edge of the forest watching me. I guess they just saw our fight. How lovely. I smile politely before apologizing and going after Edward.

How do you hold onto something you know you were never meant to have? You lie and cheat until everything backfires and you find yourself alone because what you got in life was never as good as what you weren't meant to have.

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**A/N** Tanya feels a lot, and i think you can see that in here. I'm pretty sure this is the first Tanya POV i've done, so i'm extremely happy with the way this turned out. :D

REVIEWS = LOVE

-taylorcullenforever


	18. Our Hearts

**Oliver**

How do you tell someone you don't love them when you told them you did, in fact, love them? Is there some kind of easy equation that people use for this kind of situation? I don't even know why I told Bella I loved her in the first place. I'm not sure why I did any of the things I did with Bella. I shouldn't have even gotten involved with her. She was so beautiful full, so strong it seemed. Like she was made of metal but drawn out with the colors of the rainbow.

I'd heard about her through her singing, instead of meeting like normal people meet—passing by. I'd stood in front of that stage as she walked on in combat boots, a shredded shirt that showed off her curves, and her hair curling around the soft edge of her face. People had been cheering for her, only knowing her as a singer instead of knowing her like I did. As my brother's past love—the one he miraculously left. He'd told me about her over a conversation a few weeks after he'd left her.

When he talked about her he used only the best of words to describe her—his words painting a picture of a girl that even I couldn't deny. That night—after becoming more than interested in this girl he loved—I hung up the phone only to turn to the playing TV who was now selling tickets to Bella Swan's concert that was in two weeks.

That was how I first met her. In that room, full of bouncing people, laser lights, and a woman with a talent for signing. She'd glanced at me one or twice or five times but it was only after I'd talked to her that she had only looked because I resembled Edward in some ways. Thinking back to the night we had our first conversation, I felt like a ton of bricks were slamming down on my chest. Making it incredibly hard to breathe, or be rational.

Bella came down off the stage, her necklaces swinging around her pale neck in such a way it reflected light from the ceiling onto her skin. I took in a breath, sliding in-between bodies to find myself face to face with her only seconds later. She had been laughing about something, however as she warily stared at me with a tight expression her laughter died. I opened my mouth to say something, anything. When nothing came out, I almost slammed the palm of my hand onto my face because I'd gone through all this trouble to meet her and I hadn't even thought about what to say to her.

"_Hi." She starts, dipping her head so that our eyes connected. She smiled lightly, fanning herself with her hands. _

"_How are you?" I ask, wishing I'd been a guy with a sense of humor. That would have made me more inviting—more appealing—than me simply spiking up an ordinary conversation she probably has with more people than I can count. _

"_A little hot, a little excited, and a little caught up in the moment. How about you?" She walks off, looking over at me from behind her shoulder. I follow her, grabbing a bottle of water that sits on a table next to the chair she's now occupying. _

"_I'm doing fine now that I've met you." I reply, watching her as she nods her head before cracking a full-out smile. She wipes the condensation from the bottle of water she's holding onto her jeans before outstretching a hand. I grab it, shaking, as I note how soft her skin is. _

"_What's your name?" She asks, settling back into her seat. I lean against the table with water, taking a sip from my bottle._

"_Oliver Masen." I say. Her eyes widen for second, water choking her. I watch her fumble with her bottle and wiping up the water that's spurted from her mouth before taking the bottle from her hands. She thanks me roughly, covering a napkin over her mouth._

"_That was embarrassing." _

"_Not as embarrassing as peeing your pants in front of your entire school at a pep-rally. At the age of 17." She looks up at me under her long lashes before cracking up. Her shoulders shake with the equivalent force of an earthquake. _

"_Did that really happen to you?" I nod my head, knowing that if I could I'd be blushing right now. At the fact that I did in fact pee myself at the age of 17 and in front of my entire school but also the fact that that's the second thing she knows about me. So much for making a decent first impression. _

"_So…"_

"_Can I have your number?" I blurt out, knowing this is totally straight forward. _

"_You know, I know what you are." She says, then cackles again at something I'm completely oblivious to. I wiggle my eyebrows suggestively, understanding that she's talking about the fact I'm vampire._

"_Do I scare you?" I ask, bearing my teeth. She stops laughing, stops smiling, just looks at me. Like she's seen this before. I guess with Edward._

"_Not at all." It's my turn to laugh again. She pulls a sharpie out of the back pocket of her jeans, coaxing me closer to her with her finger. When I don't budge, she sighs, gets up, and then secures my arm in her hands. _

_Ripping the cap off the sharpie with her teeth, she writes down her number along my arm, grinning when she's done. I don't look at the digits, instead studying how her face still holds a hint of childishness. Too soft to be anything but childlike. _

"_Thank you." I murmur, forgetting what I was doing. Pulling away, I walk out of the room. Leaving her standing there with a smug expression on her glowing face. What exactly is so funny, I think, before taking a look at my arm? _

_583-GO2-HELL_

_I turn around to ask for her real number. She's not there. _

She wasn't a vampire then. Just another girl who was looking everywhere in a search to find herself. She'd been too hurt by Edward then to actually start another one. She had needed time; I'd given her so much time. Now here I was, at our old house. Wondering why she'd reacted so badly to finding out that I was Edward's brother.

Had he hurt her that bad? I could see Edward doing damage to someone but not like that. I'd picked Bella up; I'd nursed her back to life when there were days she wouldn't even get out of bed. I guess all this time it had been about Edward—what he'd done to her. It really had never been about us or me. Just her and Edward, the past that had gotten left behind in the wind. To be forgotten by everyone but Bella.

All that just leads to the same question. How do you tell someone you don't love them when you'd already told them you did?

How do you tell someone you don't love them when you told them you did, in fact, love them? You don't tell them until the time comes when there's absolutely nothing left to say—you tell them when you know they're strong enough that when it sinks in they'll be able to turn around, without a single ounce of hurt, and start all over again, like they were in that moment reincarnated.

* * *

I liked this chapter, really starting to like Oliver. He's not such a bad guy after all. :D

REVIEW = LOVE

-taylorcullenforever


	19. I Don't Want To Waste Another Day

**Bella**

When do you know whether you can trust someone like you did when you were in love with him or her? When all you could think were all the good things you'd encountered with them by your side. Is it possible to trust someone so much that when they break it the first time, it's so shattered from having been stretched so tight that when the axe had come soaring through it? When can you tell yourself that it's time to let go of everything you've ever held onto—the past? "Care to take a walk with me?" He asks, standing at the doorway of my bedroom. Alex lounges on the bed, with a book in hand. I'm sure he's listening right now; ready to intervene at any time. I press my lips together before licking them. Should I stay or should I go?

It's getting a bit cold outside, while it's so warm inside here. Just being in this room is like being wrapped up in a heated cocoon. I groan at knowing that if I accept Edward's offer, I'd be out in the cold wind in a few moments. Grabbing a blanket that's smashed under Alex's butt, I wrap it around myself tightly. Bringing up the flapping corners, to cover my mouth and chin.

Edward holds out a hand, offering me the lead. I take it, sliding down the steps slowly so that I don't trip. Even with my great balance I'm still clumsy at moments when I least expect it. The noise from the TV blares, where Emmett and Jasper are playing a video game. The controllers are in their hands, moving with such speed it takes me a moment to focus on just the controller.

Rosalie waves at me, friendly, as Alice rolls her eyes. Guys, I think, sure both Rose and Alice are thinking the same thing. I smile at them, laughing when Emmett gets so into the game he throws himself off the couch in order to take a super sharp left. His car crashes into a building, getting stuck as Jasper gains more miles and speed. Edward doesn't laugh along with everyone, though, and as I turn to him he's staring at me. A pained expression written with such grooves, I take in a sharp breath that makes my ribs ache.

For a second, I almost reach out to take him into my arm. To comfort him becomes a need that burns deep inside. Blocking the feeling from my mind and gut, I storm out onto the porch. The cold wind stings my skin, making all thoughts beside the temperature vanish. I'm thankful until Edward appears next to me. He secures the blanket tighter around me, as if I'm still human and the wind is going to send me into hypothermia.

"Thank you," I say. He studies me a bit more.

"No problem. So shall we?" I start off on our walk, traveling down the stairs. I realize I've forgotten shoes, however the dirt is spongy soft under my toes. I curl my toes into the earth, smiling when dirt packs itself under my nail then crumbles on top of my skin. We walk a bit in silence, taking in the scenery that so familiar it's bittersweet.

I remember back to all those trips me and Edward took, traveling down the path to nowhere. Back then it was to spend time along together—when we actually were together. He'd pull me onto his back, walking sometimes while others he trotted or ran. He'd throw me up into the trees, fishing me out before burrowing me into a soft bush. It was different back then, of course it was. Back then we weren't split apart by things he or I did, we just were.

"Do you remember," I started, launching into a tale when we'd happen to take a trip to the ocean.

_Edward's car stopped at the edge of the beach; sand layering the ground like a patch of newly fallen snow._ _I step out from the car, closing the door in time for Edward's arms to glue themselves permanently around my waist. I giggled, melting myself into his frame before squirming till he let go. I had run off, toes thumping into the sand I was so excited. The day was warm. Clouds were out but the sun still shone lightly, pouring vitamin C into my skin. _

_I slam myself into an incoming wave, hooting with laughter as salt water dampens my clothes, covering me in a peeling layer of salt._

"_Come on, Edward!" I yell, swirling around as another wave comes crashing down against the sand. I push back my hair, rubbing the water from my eyes as I see something just below the surface of the water. Tumbling around from the force of more waves, I grab at a piece of something white. Pulling it up, I open my palm to find a small piece of coral. The grooves in it intertwines together, tracing over one another. _

_Edward kisses my neck softly, fingers tracing over the piece in my hand. He smiles, before closing our hands around it. I look up at him, happiness flooding as I get lost in his eyes. _

"_A little piece of the ocean to take back with you." He says. Releasing me, he dips down deep, grabbing something the size of a golf ball. It's purple from what I can tell, but I squeal anyway, waddling over to him. He holds it out to me and there, in his hand, is a searching hermit crab. I gasp at how pretty he is, crawling over Edward's skin. _

"_Aww. Let's keep him." He plucks our hermit crab into my cupped hands, smiling as he dives into a high wave. Panic floods me, knowing he could swim fast and end up across the world in a matter of hours. I sweep the ocean with my eyes before finding Edward's head just now bobbing up. _

_He comes closer, smiling before spitting his mouthful of water into my face. I squeal, handing off hermit to Edward before rubbing my eyes that now have salt in them. I hiss out as it burns and Edward cusses lightly before taking my hands away from my eyes. By then it's better, yet I'm sure my eyes are now a tint of red. _

"_Ah, crap. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that." I slap his arm, he looks at me baffled. _

"_Don't be sorry! I'm having fun! Plus, you didn't mean to do it on purpose." He smiles before pulling me into his arms, lips crashing down on my own. _

Edward laughs with me at the memory, pulling at leaves as we pass.

"You were so happy, at the beach."

"It was one of the rare times I had been on an actual beach."

"Really? I didn't know that." Edward says, throwing a handful of leaves at me. Some land in my hair and I grumble, trying to get them out while Edward laughs again. He doesn't know anything about me, I think, as I retrieve the leaves. He left me and never really got to know more of me before he did so.

If he hadn't left so soon, he would have learned that I loved listening to Mozart while doing Tae-bo. That before I became human, I had a human friend that had cancer and lost all of her hair—that I had shaved off all my hair to make her feel better. Or that I had insomnia for a while or that I thought about writing our story. He didn't know I'd been a hippie for six months or that I'd come to hate the world sometimes.

"What have you been doing these past years?" He asks, when the silence has become to heavy.

"Nothing much." I confess with a tiny laugh. "Just writing songs, singing, enjoying living freely. I've been touring a bit until some stuff happened. That was really fun."

"Did you go anywhere special?"

"Oh my God! I did! I got to visit Asia, parts of Europe, Italy, and Scotland, just tons of places. It was truly amazing."

"Sounds fun. Reminds me of having to move so much." I nod at him, realizing there's one thing I left out.

"I visited Volterra." When I say this, his head snaps up.

"Why?" He says this slowly, like I'm challenged or a five-year-old child having pushed her sister down the stairs.

"Because I wanted to go back there, see how beautiful the place is."

"Aro is there." I, of course, already know this. He knows I know that. So what's the big deal? I'm alive—well sort of—aren't I?

"He didn't find me, and I didn't go asking for a visit. I just looked around for a few days before flying off to somewhere else." This fact causes him to relax, letting go of the fact that I went back to Volterra.

"Bella, I think we should talk."

"I think we shouldn't." He turns me around, almost in my face.

"We need to talk now, Bella."

"NO, Edward!" I shout, blanket slipping from my fingers. "There has been years for us to talk about the shit that happened!"

"But I couldn't find you."

"You found me easy enough at my _concert_!"

"But—"

"You were fucking Tanya. Right?"

"Bella, it's not like—"

"Cut the bullshit. We've had time and more time to talk about things. There's no point in talking about things that have already happened. There's no point in remembering _every _memory we made together."

"There is a point thought! That's what you're not seeing! Things didn't happen like you think they did! There's shit you don't even know."

"Ooh, _really_!?"

"If you knew the truth, you'd confess to still loving me."

"No, I wouldn't! Because I don't love you anymore Edward." With this his face falls, this is not the first time I've lied to him and it won't be the last.

"You're such a bitch sometimes."

"And you're a fucking bastard!" Edward tries to grab for me but he gets the blanket instead as I run off into the day.

When can you tell yourself that it's time to let go of everything you've ever held onto—the past? Never because, ultimately, giving up the past would mean giving up that part of yourself you opened when you danced your way through their love.

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REVIEWS = LOVE

-taylorcullenforever


	20. Too Much To Bear

**Edward**

How do you control yourself when controlling yourself is as worthless as a scrap of paper you find lying on the floor?

For the first time ever I wanted to slap Bella across the face. I wanted her to realize that I loved her, that I fucked up, that Tanya fucked our relationship up. She just wouldn't listen, like she was scared to give me that much. I watched her run away from me, as if I was the monster I had always thought myself to be. I was ruining my last chance; I was ruining what little connection I had left with Bella. She would soon hate me, even after she learned the truth.

A break was what I needed. A break from Bella, from my family, from Tanya, from _myself_. I was drowning in my own fucking mess, without anyone to help me out. Why couldn't she _just listen_! I could tell her everything, confess so much that it would come to feel like bile rubbing against the lining of my esophagus till it ate away like acid.

Slamming my fist against a tree nearby, leaves shook from the force. Covering me as they would in fall when everything fell, only to leave new blooms behind. I was shaking with anger, with fear at loosing myself. Loosing every human feeling I'd attained since Bella had come swooping into my life. Dammit! I didn't know what to do anymore, how to feel, how to act.

Racing back to our house, I could hear Bella's voice coming from her bedroom. She was obviously talking to Alex as her words were of sorrow and anger. Her tone was hushed. It didn't matter that she talked quietly we all could hear her. Though I knew everyone besides Tanya and me were giving her privacy.

"He wanted to talk! To _talk_! I lost it. God, I should have let him talk to me." With this I feel the rage build, wondering why she just doesn't come down and give in to my offer of talking. Tanya's sitting on the couch, picking at her nails that have been recently done; they're the color of a ripe banana. I wonder why she picked such a revolting color. Oh, it's bright—sunny.

I try to loosen up but when I can't, I find my eyes staring up Tanya's revealed legs. My mind flutters with thoughts, and before I realize what I'm doing I've grabbed her the arm and am now halfway up the stairs with Tanya following behind. We reach my room and I'm instantly against her as soon as the doors closed.

Her fingers claw at my back, as I shove her against the wall, hand lifting her thigh so it wraps around me. Oh God, what am I doing? I try my best to think straight, to stop myself but I'm too far-gone. Tanya groans, hand coming down to wrap around my half-hard dick.

_He's not even hard._

Tanya's thoughts tell me she's hurt by the fact that I don't want her. Yet, when her hand brings needed friction I perk up instantly. I grind into her, biting down on her lips till they're red and swollen. She purrs almost, tears off my shirt so that she can lick my collarbone, leading down to my chest.

I growl at her, fingers diving into her hair before pulling so that I can attack her neck. She smells like Eternity by Calvin Klein. For everything it's worth, I start to dry sob right there, at the fact that her hair isn't soft as feathers floating around on a summer breeze. The fact that her smell isn't one of strawberries with morning dew still on them or that her body isn't warm and small—too curvy to be that a delicate girl that can steal your heart with a single glance.

Tanya knows I'm having a melt down. She looks desperate, holding me in her arms as she wonders what to do. She contemplates whether to do something sexual or to just hold me. I wish she'd pick the latter. Instead she picks the first. Pulling down my pants and boxers, she takes me fully into her mouth, her groans filling the air.

No, no, no! I pull out of her. She insists, wrapping her arms around my thighs till she can push me back inside her mouth. When she doesn't stop I get aggravated enough that the anger's back. I pull her up from her position on the floor, giving myself one moment to slip on a condom I found in her back pocket, before shoving myself inside her.

Once I'm inside, I pound away thinking of the day Bella and I made love for the first time. How it was perfect in so many ways, yet a total disaster in so many ways too.

"Ooh!" I hear and my eyes snap open to take in Bella's rigid form. I cuss before pulling out, nowhere near my climax even though Tanya's coming from my last shove. Bella shoves a hand over her mouth, rushing to the bathroom before I have time to stop her. I rub my face hard with my hands, before slipping off the condom and wandering off to the bathroom.

"Edward, come back!" Tanya screams for me, but I don't care. Bella's spitting up brown liquid, I guess she drank a bit more Coke than she should have. I wash my hands quickly and hold her hair back, rubbing circles in her back. She squirms from under my hands, trying to get away from my touch. I pull back, leaning against the wall.

I have just fucked up even more—when I thought it would be impossible.

Bella flushes out her mouth with water from the tap, staying hunched over.

"Let's just be friends, okay? Nothing more. Let's just stop all the fighting. Let's not talk. Let's just be." She looks weak here. The sun could beam down and she'd catch on fire. I step forward. Then step backward, nodding my head. She smiles then, an honest smile before staring at my bare chest and grimacing. Oops, I guess I should have put a shirt on.

"Just friends then." I say slowly, convincing myself the best I can at the moment. Then I walk away because hearing her say that—making a deal with her—that we will only be friends is too much to bear.

How do you control yourself when controlling yourself is as worthless as a scrap of paper you find lying on the floor? You bite your tongue and scream inside your head because on that scrap of paper lies a picture of the girl you've dreamed of for decades.

* * *

Lots of drama.

REVIEWS = LOVE

-taylorcullenforever


	21. Give Until There's Nothing Left

**Bella**

What happens when you decide to give something to someone that's so big, you know it will surely shape you in some way? Do you tell that person that you've decided to give them something they can't give themselves? Or do you question it? Let it sink in, settle into your mind so that it's a constant loop of question—Do I do this? They say that everyone needs a certain something to fully make them happy—fully complete their lives in a sort of way like finding that missing puzzle to a 500-piece puzzle that you've been yearning to finish.

The question is—being human—are we fully capable of being so selfless as to give such a piece of us to someone else. I've been asking myself this question over and over. It's starting to get to me. I couldn't make up my mind for a while, never knowing if I would be able to fully do this. To do such a big thing that I'm not sure I'm even ready for. Then it happened. I saw a sign and I knew I had to do it—no matter what.

The sign—a Pampers diaper commercial.

So here I sat with Alice and Rose splayed out on the couch. The biggest couch potatoes in the universe. Alice is flipping channels, trying to find one with at least a half-decent show that doesn't bring up clips of Girls Gone Wild. Rosalie's sitting between my legs, my fingers playing in her hands. I settled back, braiding her hair evenly before untangling it and starting over with smaller braids.

I'm not sure I can pull this off. How do I tell them what I want to without bursting out in tears of hyperventilating because I know that what I'm going to offer will set me up for a job that will have me in tears? I'm waiting for the moment of glory when I back out and slap myself across the face for being so stupid. I mean, I haven't even told Alex the information on what my life will become soon if I go through with this.

"What are you doing to my hair?" Rose asks, laughing before patting a hand over my hands. I look down to realize I've been swirling Rosalie's hair around my fingers so that it look tangled and spiky. But sexy. Hmm. I laugh along with her, kissing the top of her head, before releasing the tangles from my grasp.

"Messing around. Giving you a new hairstyle." Alice points at us and laughs. I just huff, throw a can at her head, and then smile.

"So you have any plans for the future Bella?" Alice asks, settling onto the couch beside me. This is the moment where my throat closes, bile threatens to come spilling up, and my hands become clammy. What do I say? That I want to do a certain something for somebody I love? Can I tell her the truth without flipping out or changing my mind?

Not yet, I tell myself. I won't tell them just yet. But soon, soon so that my mind won't have the option of changing my decision because it will have already been made. Plus, once I make this decision and voice it out loud, there's no taking it all back. Taking it back would hurt all of those involved. And that I couldn't take—I would never be able to forgive myself for filling people with fake hope.

"Not much. Maybe just taking it easy. Traveling some more. Making an account on eharmony." I joke, as Alice shoves my arm a bit.

"No seriously."

"I'm being serious." I reply. Maybe creating an account on eharmony would do me some good—help me find someone to love.

"You're going to get on eharmony? Yeah, right! That's for lonely people." Then she wraps an arm around my shoulder, coaxing my head into the crook of her shoulder. I sigh as I feel tears building up, just what I wanted not to happen. The truth was I was lonely, tired to having to find comfort in my family and Alex and Oliver. I counted on them because I was lonely—because I needed someone around sometimes.

Singing and writing songs made it somewhat bearable over all these years, letting me sing about sadness, loneliness, and heart break because it wasn't me I was actually talking about. But more like a distraction to let it all out, but now that reality had kicked me in the butt again and my songs were put on hold for a bit—I was starting to become a little lonelier than I'd been in years. Even with everyone I know surrounding me.

"What if I am lonely?" I ask Alice, hoping she'll come up with an answer. Instead she gives me a weird look.

"What's going on with you and Edward?" Rose asks, popping the bubble of silence that's built up in the past few seconds.

"Nothing. I just—urgh. Having a past with him just makes everything three times as worse or difficult. Either I'm remembering every moment I'd ever made with him or seeing him screw Tanya and remember that's why he—left, or dealing with the fact that so many things are no longer the same. That he's not the same. That Oliver's no longer the same. That Alex is no longer the same—somehow. That _I'm_ _no longer the same_." I'm venting completely now, my words coming out too fast. I'm choking on word vomit and it just keeps on pouring.

Then at the worst moment another sign appears, plastered to the screen of the TV. A Pampers baby diaper commercial plays, squeals from a living baby filling the room. I notice that Rosalie's gone still, eyes trained on the screen. Alice looks down at her, to the TV, then me, back down to Rose. I wonder what she's thinking at this moment. When it ends, the truth bubbles on my tongue till it feels like too much to keep inside. Like a bite of food that's so big you have to spit it back out or suffocate and choke.

"Rosalie, I want to do something for you." I start, tears already pooling in my eyes. Rosalie stands from the floor, eyes intent on my face as if she knows what I'm about to offer her.

"What?" Alice is standing now; staring at me with such wide-eyes I realize she must have had a vision. This makes me smile.

"Let me give you a child. Yours and Emmett's child." I say, tears spilling over the brim. Rose stares at me, mouth open, while Alice squeals with delight. With that Alice runs off to get Carlisle and everyone else. Rosalie looks like she should be in tears, drowning in them actually like the kind of rain that pours so heavily you can't see anything but a thick sheet of white.

"How?" She asks, voiced cracking severely.

"It's my gift."

"What?"

"Like Alice has the gift of seeing into the future, my gift is fertility—the ability to conceive even though I'm a vampire." With this information Rosalie bursts out into dry sobs, shaking so hard she collapses to her knees. I wrap my arms around her the best I can, rocking us back and forth as we both realizes just what I've just done.

What happens when you decide to give something to someone that's so big, you know it will surely shape you in some way? You give until there's nothing left.

* * *

Yeah, so i gave Bella the gift of concieving depsite her being half vampire. Ooh, what do you think about that? I like it, now Rose can be happy.

-taylorcullenforever


	22. Everybody's Changing

**Okay, to clear up things a bit. Bella is half-vampire. Since The Cullens left a LONG time ago, Bella was bitten by a vampire--unknown in this story--but her body took differently to it only changing halfway. Letting some human things stay like blushing, crying, sleeping. Stuff such as those. **

* * *

Carlisle

When do you ever fully see someone for who they are? Is it when she offers up something as precious as her body—to incubate a baby for someone other than herself? Never in my life have I ever come along someone who was as selfless enough to offer to carry a child for a woman who did not have the option of carrying a child in her belly. And only doing this because she wanted to—earning nothing out of this. Bella has completely stunned me, as she has done to everyone else. She sat on the couch as we gazed longingly at her, wondering why she would do such a thing? Especially in the middle of a fight with my son over a past none of us could forget.

I wanted to hug the life out of her—not literally. But enough that she understood how grateful _I_ was for deciding to do this for Rose. Bella's known for a long time now how much having a baby would mean to Rose and Emmett. She knew how much Rose yearned for a baby to the point it made her physically sick. Here she was maybe thinking that it's time Rose stopped suffering over something that was undeniably unchangeable.

"Bella," I start, getting ready to ask her how she is going to do this. She is half-vampire, meaning she shouldn't be able to conceive—let alone carry around a child for nine months—in her frozen state. Bella shakes her head vigorously before holding up her hand. She takes a breath before saying anything.

"Please do not ask me why I choose to do this. For I know why, but at the same time I don't." I smile as I realize Bella is still—to a point—the same seventeen-year-old Bella we'd left so long ago. The one who was stubborn and only knew the reasons for half the things she did. Her eyes traveled over to Rose who was staring at her with the biggest smile I've ever seen her wear. Even Emmett looks a bit dazzled.

"How do you plan on doing this when you're vampire?" I ask, watching as Rosalie's smile never falters when I was so sure it would. With Bella being vampire, it could ruin this entire chance at Rosalie having the baby she wanted.

"Well, I have a gift." This is news to me. Why hadn't she told us? I supposed there must be a reason for why she kept it to herself—possibly because of the extent of her gift? Was it dangerous? Embarrassing? Bella doesn't seem to want to say any more. "And—it's the ability to conceive even with me being vampire." Everyone except Rose gasps, almost blown away by the gift that's been handed to her.

"How do you know this?" She contemplates my question before staring dumbly at us.

"You know, that's a good question." She presses her hands into the softness of her belly. "I just _know_. Since I was turned I just knew _deep down_ that it was my gift. Like someone had told me while I was turning—in so much pain I didn't register it. I just know." She says lightly, face so serious it almost makes me want to fold her up in my arms—let her be a child again who knows its okay to hold onto someone.

"Okay," I start, thinking this through. There were many operations she could go through for this to work. But this would only work with the fact that Rosalie had froze twenty eggs for a day like this to come and the fact that Emmett had semen like fluids that could conceive a child. "How do you want to do this?"

"IVF—in vitro fertilization." She says. That would actually be a high-chanced option that would be easy along with effective. With Rose's eggs, since they are frozen, I would have to unfreeze them, then mature them until they were just right. Since Bella would be the one carrying the baby, I'd have to wait for Bella's—oh.

"Bella, do you have menstrual cycle?" She burns a bit red, looking down at her hands before titling her head left and right as if trying to lighten the mood of the question.

"Yes. Despite me being vampire and all, it came with the gift." Then it would work. I'd wait for Bella's menstrual cycle—the time where I'd combine Rose's egg and Emmett's sperm. I would have to wait to see if they became embryos and if they did then the eggs would be implanted in Bella's womb once I'd taken out her egg if she happened to release one. I'd implant two embryos in case one failed, if so there would still be a chance at the other succeeding.

"Carlisle?" Bella speaks up.

"Yes?" I say.

"It is possible that if two eggs were put inside me—both conceived by different sperm—that both eggs could attach to my uterus and grow normally into two babies with different fathers?" Her question is actually one that's been brought to the attention of doctors all around the world. A woman becoming pregnant with two babies that don't have the same father and have been made with two different sperm. Why she would ask about this, I'm not sure.

"Yes, why?" She looks me dead in the eye now, something in her eyes pleading with me.

"I want a baby too."

When do you ever fully see someone for who they are? You don't, you see a person fully over the span of a lifetime—only knowing them fully when you are both on your deathbed.

* * *

'OMG' kind of chapter. :D Tell me what you think.

P.S I researched about IVF and doing the procedure with frozen eggs--doctors have recently found that it works. As for two babies being in the womb when they're concieved by different sperm is actually possible.

-taylorcullenforever


	23. Torn

**Oliver**

Why do people hold onto to memories, going back in time to relive each moment?

Bella's sitting in her room, singing with her eyes closed. I'm not sure whether to bug her, or leave or sit down and watch her. Her voice sends shivers down my spine, bringing me back to days where it was just me and her sitting in our lonely house. How we'd throw food across the room at each other because we could and there was no one to stop us. Seeing her like this brought me head-on into a memory.

_All I saw was a piece of pizza flying toward my head. When I came landing in my lap, ruining my nice pair of pants, I pushed it away in disgust. Why did we even have pizza in the house in the first place? I heard Bella's soft snicker coming from the kitchen and realize she'd been the thrower, using me as the target. I got up, then, trailing into my bedroom for the hidden snacks I kept in a drawers. Ho-Hos, Twinkies, Oatmeal Cookies, anything and everything._

_Bella was twirling around like a Ballerina, her cottoned feet slipping across the tile for, as she weaved her body into a song she was listening to. My hand, on it's own, reached out for her—wondering if I touched her would she disappear into a cloud of smoke. Too real to be anything but a dream. When her figure becomes too painful to look at her without feeling the need to love her with all my might, I ripped open a package of snack cakes. Then smashed them in her face. _

_She instantly stopped dancing, body almost hunched over as her hands scrapped at the mess splattered across her nose, cheeks, and forehead. Bella laughed out loud before turning around, popping open a can of chip before sending them flying towards me. I let out a manly scream—no way was I going to scream like a girl—and continued to smash cakes on her clothes, hair, and face. _

_Everything that was sent flying my way was dry food until Bella came sliding out of the kitchen with smeared socks on her feet that were no longer white. There in her hands was a bottle of ketchup—an extra-sized bottle. I throw my hands up now, for there is so way she's going to ruin my clothes for real, along with paint our walls with red goo. _

"_Bella, I give up. You win, you win." Her face falls and she looks—lost, sad, angry, and distant. Her fingers slip from the bottle and it falls to floor—spewing out its liquid. She heaves in a breath, tears pilling up in her eyes until she viciously wipes them away. _

_She retrieves the bottle, padding over to me until she's looking up at me. _

"_What if I don't want to win? What if I want you to keep fighting till you win?" She wraps my fingers around the bottle before kissing me and walking away._

_All I hear is, "For once, I wish I'd lose the fight." _

"Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these sunken eyes and learn to see

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to be free."

She still doesn't seem to know I'm here. Finding an extra stool, I noiselessly pick it up, sitting down next to her figure. Why can't I love her? After all these days of being with her, I don't love her like I should—like I want to. I'm not even sure why I should love her, but something inside tells me I should. That I should love her because she needs me to. I don't understand it but at that moment I need her, I need her around me.

She stops singing instantly once my arms are around her waist, head awkwardly pressed into her side. She's so warm to me, like the sun pressing into my back without burning me. Bella's like a mountain, the kind of mountain that's so tall and steep it breaks through the clouds and its tip lands in Heaven. I've been climbing the mountain for days, months, with feet swelling from the rocks that make up her body. Slipping when it all becomes too much, when I don't have enough strength. The higher I climb, the steeper she becomes, keeping me away from the top of her—her core. She won't let me in.

I don't think she'll ever let me in.

"Olly?" Her voice is concerned, her hands soothing my skin as her fingers poke and rub, trying to get a response out of me. I shut my eyes and hold her tighter, just wanting to stay like this for the moment. Where she's comforting me, the only thing that seems stable.

"Baby, what's wrong?" She bends her head down low, her lips brushes over my hair in an attempt to make everything right. She's so selfless—so worried about others when she should be worried about herself. She should worry about how I could hurt her, how Edward could hurt her, even Alex.

"Sometimes, I lie awake at night and think about my parents. How they used to always be there for Edward and me, how they were gone in a moments notice. And then I realize I miss them." My voice chokes and Bella pulls me full into her, arms wrapped around me till I swear we're one body.

"I know, I know. We always miss the ones we lose." With that, everything's better. She does care for me in a way, even if she doesn't exactly love me.

"What if I told you that I don't care for you like I should?" She rocks us back and forth. I expected her to yell, scream, and get mad at me for lying. But when she smiles at me and kisses the top of my forehead like I'm her child in need of comforting, I wonder what's happened to the Bella I knew before she came to the Cullens?

"I'd say 'Thank you'."

Why do people hold onto to memories, going back in time to relive each moment? Because they're all we have left.

* * *

Oliver seems just as lost as the rest of them. :(

Review please and let me know what you think!

Random Question; What's your angry song? (the song you listen to while angry XD)

-taylorcullenforever

REVIEWS = LOVE


	24. Something In Common

**Tanya**

What do you do when you find yourself letting go of someone you've already ruined?

I'm meeting someone at a coffee shop today. The guy is the last one I'd thought I'd ever meet up with. Actually, I'm positive that meeting with him will only do damage. He's supposedly off-limits to Bella. Hmm—does that make me even more of a horrible person? Walking past a little pet shop, I stop when four puppies come tumbling into the glass wall. They wiggle their tiny tails, tongues hanging out while they bark and pant.

They're so adorable, for a moment I consider getting one. Though, what good will a dog do me? Be my companion? Stay by my side when everyone turns their backs to me? I stand there for a second, gazing into their eyes that plead with me to take them away. Pressing my palm against the glass, they lick endlessly at it. Bringing a smile to my lips, yet when my feet form a mind of their own, I speed away from the window before I buy one.

The sky is nice today—a baby blue. Helping my mood to come up to a light spurt of never ending happiness. I feel like I'm scuba diving deep under the water. The oxygen tank hooked to my back pressing me down deeper, into unknown territory where I have nothing but my instinct to maneuver my way. Yet as I walk past everybody with people beside them I realize seeing these people—couples, friends, and children—is like seeing creatures hiding among the coral. Intriguing.

I enter the coffee shop to find myself a bit early. There's a businessman in the corner, hogging a love seat as he types away at his laptop. As I take a seat in the very far corner, I spot a lady sporting a protruding stomach that has to be at least 8 months. She looks genuinely happy sitting there reading a What To Expect When You're Pregnant book, tabs hanging out over the edge of the pages.

I snarl to myself—anger rumbling—as I envy this woman. She gets a child, probably a husband, and a good life. Though, that's only what I see from the inside. She could be dying from Cancer or has another child that's dying from Leukemia or that is suicidal. Her husband could be cheating with another woman—giving the old 'have to stay late at work' card so he can hook up. That's when I feel bad—when I don't envy her anymore.

There are so many things that could be going on in her life that I don't even know about. My life's going fine at the moment and I'm happy for what I have. I also feel bad for the last suggestion—the husband cheating. How is that any different from what I made Edward do which was sleep with me while he was with Bella. That's the main reason he hates me so deep down like he does, because I made him. He wasn't willing, or giving, and it angered me so I took what I wanted.

God, why didn't I just—

"Hey." He says, sliding in the seat across from me. His black Harley Davidson shirt brings back memories of one my father used to have. His hairs messy, spiked almost from having just gotten out of the shower. From here I can smell him—a combination of Old Spice and—oddly—Dove soap. This brings on a smile.

"Hello." I reply, wondering why he asked me to meet him here.

"Do you like cats?" Oliver asks, elbows resting against the table as he leans his cheek into the palm of his hand.

"No." I let my eyes trace the patterns of the table, the wood swirling in directions that make it seems they were put there on purpose—a ever lasting reminder of who was at this table. Where they might have sat here once with the love of their life across from them, embedded their own mark into the table, only to die a week later. God, that's so depressing.

"Do you like Volvos for a car?" This makes me think of Edward.

"No."

"Do you like romantic comedies?"

"No."

"Do you like the oceans or lakes?"

"Why?"

"Because, I'm trying to see if we have anything in common."

"Ocean."

"Lakes." Oliver sighs, running his hand through his hair—sending a waft of Old Spice into my nose.

"What's your favorite book?" I decide to tell him one he probably hasn't even read.

"Pages For You by Sylvia Brownrigg."

"Ooh, that lesbian book? Where it's like a teacher, student thing?" My face feels hot and I press my lips together. How did he know that?

"Yeah." I blow out.

"Do you like writing?"

"No."

"Singing?"

"No."

"Reading?"

"Yes."

"Art?"

"Yes."

He leans back into his chair, arms bending behind his back. He studies my face for a while, something floating in his eyes that I've never seen before. Why does he make me so jittery and nervous? Like I can't breath because I'm afraid he'll point me out on my bullshit. I wonder if, with one look, he gets who I am. Who I want to be but have yet to become?

"Found anything we have in common?" I ask, smiling smugly. I'm sure he hasn't. We don't seem like two people that would have things in common.

"No." Then he eyes me warily, before leaning in so far that his lips are only inches away from mine—his breath smelling like berries. My stomach rolls. I feel his hand, hot, upon mind.

"Are you really happy with Edward Cullen?" This time, I pull away, crossing my arms over my chest.

"_How dare you_!" I say, taken back by how he could just ask me that. He knows how shit went down. He was there.

"Are you _really_ happy with him?" He asks again.

"No." I let out, my armor slipping from my body in a trickle of liquid.

"Are you happy with Bella Swan?" I ask.

"No."

"Ooh." I say, realizing I'd expected him to say he was in fact happy with Bella. Then he smiles.

"What?" I say.

"I've found something we have in common." Then he gets up, crosses over to me. I stare up at him as he takes my palms into his own hands.

He kisses me and this—us kissing—is the only thing in my life that's _ever_ felt _right_.

What do you do when you find yourself letting go of someone you've already ruined? You let go completely and hope they turn out for the best.

* * *

Sorry, i stopped updating daily! Went camping for a bit! hah, dont do it.

What did you think of this chapter? I finally decided that maybe everyone needed a happy ending. :D

-taylorcullenforever

REVIEWS = LOVE


	25. A Mother's Prayer

**Rosalie**

***~*~*~*~*~*~***

**5 MONTHS LATER**

***~*~*~*~*~*~***

How do you repay someone for giving you something that's more than anything else entirely?

Ever since we'd left Bella all those years ago, I'd finally loved her like I should have from the start. Seeing Bella's crumpled face when Edward told her it was over was excruciating. I should have slapped Edward across his pitiful face. We all should have. Now Bella was a tough independent woman who seemed to not need Edward as much as she used to.

Bella had looked all of us straight in the face when she told us she wanted to volunteer holding my child in her womb. When she first told Alice and me, I had thought she was joking—yeah, that would have been pretty harsh. Maybe the stuff going on between her and Edward—including Oliver and Alex—had messed with her brain. Yet, here we were five months after she had undergone the IVF. She was four months and two weeks pregnant. Fully forming, too.

Carlisle had taken two from the group of the last of my eggs, setting them in her uterus. Both eggs were mine in deed, but only one had attached. Sadly, but for certain reasons, she was not having a child of her own yet.

"Ugh! Nothing feels right anymore!" Bella screams, trampling down the stairs with her clothes stretched across her to accommodate her bulging belly.

"What doesn't fit, Bella?" I ask, coddling her in my arms. She doesn't fit right anymore, her extra curves demanding more space.

"My clothes." She mumbles, feet tittering as she leans into me obviously exhausted. I laugh before pulling back, all the while rubbing my hands along the lengths of her arms.

"I'm so tired." She says, when her cat—Aphrodite—comes slinking around her legs. We'd all gotten her for Bella one day when we realized she was a bit more lonely than she'd been leading on. Aphrodite seemed to soothe her during her bad days that reminded me of a woman PMSing. Surprisingly, no one had attacked the kitty nor had it gotten hurt.

A knock came from the front door, causing us both to turn. What we found was Emmett holding a bottle of febreeze laundry soap and Alex holding a bag from Sonic. Bella sighed happily, walking from me to Alex. So here's the thing—Alex and Bella are still not officially together. I wasn't the only one who was waiting for them to finally get together, either.

Alex wrapped his arm around her, just as Edward grunted from the couch. We all gave him a look, daring him to say something that would upset her. He eyes Bella for a second, a sad look coming across his face before he turns to Tanya who's sitting next to him.

Alex wrapped his arm around Bella, shuffling them into the kitchen so she could eat. I turn to Emmett who was watching them too. He smiles, kissing my forehead.

"We're having a baby." Emmett says, breath curving around my ear. I beam at him, the feeling that I'm going to cry returning. He rubs his hands over my stomach lightly, kissing me. I press myself again himself, not caring that Bella's pointing and gagging right now.

When he pulls back he says "Just five more months." Which sends my heart soaring. Emmett looks over my shoulder before wrapping me in his arms and bending us over as he belches out a loud laugh. He points behind us, and I turn to find Bella chowing down on a chilidog. Her face is one of bliss and now I realize why it's so funny. She stares at her, her mouth stilling before she smiles.

"You're so cute when you're eating." Alex says, crushing her to his chest. She stands up on her tippy-toes, rubbing her greasy mouth over his checks. Alex stands there, taking it, like it doesn't even matter that he's all gross now. Alex laughs, taking a napkin from the counter before wiping both of them down.

Bella grabs his chin tightly in her hand, smiling before pressing a quick kiss to his lips. He freezes and I share glances with everyone who's now watching. Bella lets out a laugh before kissing a frozen Alex who's staring at her so intently I'm surprised she isn't freaking out. Her eyes fall on us, and we can tell she knows we have just witnessed their first kiss and will never let her live it down.

"He's not even right for her." Edward mumbles, too softly for Bella to hear it.

"Are you interested in Bella, Edward?" Tanya hisses, hand on his thigh.

"No…" Edward says, so unconvincing.

"Stay out of it, Edward. You lost your chance a long time ago." I say. Edward gapes at me, almost pleading me to take my words back.

Emmett throws the laundry soap at Alex who catches it and opens it quickly. Bella's not paying attention, mouth already open for another bite. Alex tips the bottle above her head, watching as the goo globs onto her head. She shrieks but takes one sniff and sighs. Turning to him she says,

"You got me the soap too." He kisses her nose.

I stare at Bella's belly, wanting to rub my hands over it for hours. Just to know it won't go away, to know that it will be there when morning breaks. The need for a child has somewhat gone away; in its place a serious basket of hope and happiness. And I cannot thank Bella enough for what she's doing—for helping me out.

How do you repay someone for giving you something that's worth more than anything else in the world? By giving all you have till there's nothing else.

* * *

The story will be ending soon! Only about six more chapters. I'm so sad!

REVIEWS = LOVE

-taylorcullenforever


	26. The End

Hi, Everyone.

I Am Done Writing Fanfiction Stories Or Beta(ing). For Good.

I Found What I Was Looking For.

**I'm In Love.**

So I'm Giving Up Fanfiction.

It Was Great While It Lasted.

Bye

:)

-Taylor


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